


From the depths of despair at the bottom of a liquor bottle.     Now with sequel and prequel. After two long weeks its finally finished.

by Xbertyx



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Drug Use, F/M, Heavy Drinking, Rape Aftermath, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-08-17
Packaged: 2018-04-09 13:08:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 40
Words: 34,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4349999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xbertyx/pseuds/Xbertyx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Well you guys should know the drill by now. Rape and violence from chapter one.<br/>William has begun to have a drinking problem.  Grell tries to help her lover while being on the receiving end of his outbursts. But what happens when Ronald finds out what she is being put through?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Smashed bottles and broken skin.

 A loud bang echoed through the living room of a large house, the home of one high status reaper and his partner. "Get off me!" A female voice shrieked. There was another loud bang, as a liquor bottle smashed over her head. She slid down the wall she had been pressed against.

 A hand gripped her hair and she was pushed face first into the floor. Her head started to spin from the wound caused by the sharp glass. The man climbed on top of her. "William let me go, you're just drunk again! You'll regret doing this in the morning."

 The man pulled the tie from his dressing gown, before twisting the woman's arms painfully behind her back. He pressed his weight down on her hands to keep her arms in place as he bound her wrists. Leaning down next to her ear, voice thick with venom, he spat, "shut up, you dirty slut, I warned you not be messing around with Ronald tonight."

 She gritted her teeth as the man slid down her body to sit on the bottom of her legs, hands sliding up the back of her skirt. "I told you, it was his birthday party tonight, he's got a girlfriend for God's sake."

 "I said shut up! Ugh! I don't even want to look at you. Just keep quiet." She tried to roll over and kick her legs but it just ended with the man's knees slipping between her now parted thighs, holding her hips to the floor.

 "Keep still, you whore. You know as well as I do that you like this." His hands moved up her skirt again, tearing her pants from her. He pulled his own pants down from under his open dressing gown, then gripped her hips and rammed inside her mercilessly.

 She yelped in pain, muscles clenching, trying to stop the intrusion. "William, please stop, you're just drunk! Nothing happened ... wi ... with Ronnie tonight, I swear. Ah, stop it ... you ... you're hurting me!"

 "Don't you just love talking about your precious Ronnie. I told you to shut your filthy mouth." He thrust into her harder, making his point known. Realising there was no escape, she screwed her eyes shut, willing the tears not to come.

 Blood leaked down her legs as the man above her grunted and moaned in sick pleasure. Every thrust felt like thorns sticking into her. Finger nails dug into her skin, drawing blood and forming bruises.

 She tried to keep quiet as not to anger him but with every painful push of the other, small whimpers and whines fell from her lips. His head fell back as he started to reach his climax. He stunk of booze, the smell wafting up her nostrils and making her feel even more sick to her stomach than she already felt.

 "Ah you feel so ... so good, stupid slut." He released into her and then pulled her bindings off roughly, pulling out and staggering up the stairs.

 She got to her knees slowly, body shaking in pain. Shuffling into the bathroom, she cleaned the blood from her face caused by the smashed bottle and then pressed a towel to her lower regions, to stem the bleeding. She went back into the living room and lay down on the sofa, hoping to get some sleep.

William had been drinking heavily for few months now, after the deaths of Alan and Eric. Most people knew he wasn't close to the other reapers but he blamed himself for Eric's demise and all the souls he had unfairly taken.

 The problem had started slowly, Grell hardly realising anything was wrong, until it was too late. When he drank, he got violent. Grell was always on the receiving end, every night. He always got angry over something, no matter how small or stupid. Tonight it was over seeing Ronald. If he would have been sober, he wouldn't have cared.

 She woke up at around three am, her partner shaking her shoulder. Tears were streaming down his face as they always did once he started to sober. She moved over on the seat to let William lie down next to her. He pushed his head against her chest, sobbing into the material of her top. She wrapped her arms around him, wandering just how they would ever get out of this mess.


	2. Confrontation.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I found this chapter so hard to write. Have spent all day adding to it and editing it. Hope to God it turned out ok?

 Morning came and Grell started to stir. She was still lay on the sofa from last night but William had already gone to work. He had been working the morning shift until five pm, whereas Grell worked from twelve until eight. That schedule just made matters worse, as by the time she got home, he was already drunk. She dreaded eight pm coming everyday, when she knew she'd have to face William and his violent side.

 She sat up slowly, her back and bum still extremely sore after last night. She looked down at a blanket that lay on her, William obviously covering her with it when he left for work, so she wouldn't get cold without him there. 'Always so sweet when you're sober William, I want that man back', she thought with a sigh, as she tried to get up.

 A sharp pain shot up her back and she yelped, gripping onto the arm of the chair. She steadied herself and straightened up. She walked slowly to the bathroom to take a shower, stripping her top off and peeling her skirt away from her skin slowly, as blood had stuck to it. The shower helped relieve some of her aches and she stayed there for a while, glad for the warmth and soothing power of the water. Then she stepped out carefully.

 Drying herself off, she looked in the mirror, no bruises or scratches visible on her face. 'My hair will cover this easily', she thought, thinking of the gash on her head, that was making it pound. She looked down at her hips, scratches and bruises from William's nails evident. She then went to get ready for work, deciding on a long shirt to hide her bruised wrists, caused by the restraints last night.

 She couldn't stomach anything as was always the case in the mornings after the previous night's events. Just thinking of her usually sweet William acting like a brute made her stomach churn. As such, she left to go to work, hungry.

 Walking down the hall to her desk, she hoped no one would notice she was walking oddly, pain still in her lower regions. "Hey Grell! Mornin."

 The redhead turned around carefully to see Knox running up to her. "Oh morning." She said, trying to sound more cheerful than she felt. "How's my Ronnie doing?"

 He made an exaggerated sighing noise."I'm ok bu' that new girl o' mine is doin' my head in. She's so clingy an' jealous."

 Grell looked at him, puzzled. Jealous?"

 "She thinks I spend too much time wi' y'. She don' get that we're jus' best mates. I've told 'er plenty of times. Wait, are you feelin' okay?" He said, noticing how she had just turned a paler shade.

 "I'm fine Ronnie. I have to go do some paperwork though. I'll see you on duty later." With that she rushed off as quickly as her injured body would allow. When she got to her desk, she sat down with her head in her hands and began to cry. Everyone seemed to be against her friendship with Ronald. Even William, when he was drunk. She stayed like that for a little while, worrying about everything that was going on in her life right now, before she tried to pull herself together and do paperwork.

 Later that day she went on assigment with Ronald. Her body hurt when she picked up her chainsaw and all the rushing about to collect numerous souls was exhausting her psychically. Her mind was already exhausted.

 She got back to branch and went to finish the paperwork. As five o'clock came into view, William came into her room, with a cup of tea in hand for her. He put it down on her desk and bent down to wrap his arms around her shoulders, kissing her neck. "I'm so sorry about last night." He said, feeling her tense against his touch.

 She turned to look at him, the stress getting to her. "You always say that. Why don't you just not hurt me in the first place?!"

 William let go of her, feeling guilty but also annoyed. He knew where this conversation was going. "Grell-."

 Grell scowled at him. "Why won't you just stop drinking! You're destroying our relationship, William. I don't deserve this."

 "Don't start whining at me again! You don't understand how I feel!" With that he left, slamming the door behind him and leaving Grell scared that she'd made a mistake by bringing it up and angering him. 'I don't understand because you never talk to me, you just use violence,' she thought sadly.

 William finished up at work, his day being over and went home. As soon as he got to the kitchen, he grabbed a bottle of whisky and downed half the bottle at once. He was upset at Grell but it was only because he knew she was right. He did love her but he couldn't help lashing out at her when the alcohol took affect.

 It was easier for him to do that than to admit how much he was hurting. He felt he should have realised what Eric was up to. He was his supervisor after all. He had been stupid, to have not believed Eric was capable of such things and he had ended up dead, having taken the souls of 999 innocent people. William just couldn't bring himself to forgive himself for his indiscretion.

 He downed the rest of the bottle and then the next by seven pm. As Grell's time of returning neared, the alcohol had started the wear off slightly but the anger and now hate was consuming him. He shoved a knife into his coat pocket and went to wait for his lover in the hallway. His mind was realing, sanity blown out the window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh what is William going to do?


	3. Punctured.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Horrible scent. I'm sorry. William losing his sanity over his woes and insurcurities.

 Grell pushed her key into the lock, heart beating fast from anxiety. She knew what was waiting for her inside. She wanted nothing more than to just run to Ronald's flat and hide there in safety. She couldn't however, she knew that once William found out, he would just treat her even more barbarically, after he had turned back to his drink. She thought she could maybe get away from another awful night, if she could get up to the bedroom before William realised she was home.

 That hope faded as she entered the hallway, straight away being pushed against the nearest wall. William's hand gripped around her throat, pressing down with a deathly force onto her Adam's Apple. His eyes were devoid of any emotion. "William what are you doing?! Let me go!"

 He pressed his body against hers, erection rubbing against her leg. "Shut your mouth! Just who do you think you are, judging me like that. I should just kill you now." Grell's eyes widened. He had never threatened her like this before.

 "William please! I didn't mean to upset you ... I just ... I'm just worried about you." She began to cry. She felt angry but more than anything, she was petrified.

 "You're pathetic Grell! You act all high and mighty but you're just a little wretch. I hate you! " His eyes started to shine with anger and she realised that he wasn't in fact as drunk as usual. Maybe she could reach out to his softer side?

 "I thought you .... you loved me. I love you so much. Please ... Please just stop this."

 "Just shut up! How could I love a little tart like you. You just mess around, don't pretend otherwise."

 "No I don't, I -." Her voice caught in her constrained throat as she felt something cold and sharp sink into the flesh of her stomach. Her eyes went wide in shock, as William twisted the knife slowly and painfully, sinking it deeper before he pulled it away and let it clatter to the floor.

 "That should stop your whining!" Her hand slid onto the wound. She felt blood on her palm. She could feel it dripping down her side, staining her skirt. "Wil ... William. h ... how ... could ... y ... you?" Her voice was just a whisper. Her whole being was frozen in disbelief, in absolute shocking fear.

 He let go of her throat and grabbed her shoulder, turning her around and shoving her deeper against the wall. Her nose hit off the brick, blood oozing down her face. "I'll teach you a fucking lesson! You'll never cross me again."

 Before her whirling mind registered anything, her skirt was pulled up and her pants pulled downwards. William pulled his own bottoms and pants down and let them fall to his ankles. He pressed his weight against her as his hands spread her cheeks. 

  "William ... I love you ... pl- ahhh!". He rammed into her harshly, trying to block out her cries. Her legs felt shaky and her head started to spin from blood loss, the blood from the stab wound running down to the floor between her body and wall.

 He picked up speed, hands moving to press the wall at her sides, as he tore inside her. The force of him was bouncing her body off the wall, making her wound throb even more painfully. She shut her eyes and tried to block it out but it was no use, the pain kept bringing her back to reality. He grunted like an animal, as he drew near to climaxing.

 "Dirty little bitch. You deserve .... All of this! ... hmm ... ahhh." He came inside her sharply, a few more pounds into her broken body as semen mixed with blood. He pulled out of her roughly and her legs buckled.

 She tumbled to the floor and fell to her side. Her hand gripping the puncture, as she tried to steady her breath. She rolled away from the wall to look up at the man she so loved. The man who had just crushed her heart like a flimsy scrap of paper.

 He glared down at her, before he kicked his bottom clothes off and his foot slammed her sharply in the stomach. She whimpered and slipped onto her back. He lifted his leg and pressed his foot down into her stomach.

 She started to sob louder, pain shooting up her side and through her torn body. "I'm going to hurt you in so many ways, you'll never be able to run off to your little boyfriend ever again."

 "But ... I love you." She whispered, expecting him to beat her senseless at any moment. She prayed he would see her agony and stop. That he still did actually love her.


	4. William's decision.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Really like the detail in this chapter. Enjoy.

 "But I love you." A short gasp left William's mouth, as he looked down at his beautiful partner laying pressed under his foot, bleeding badly from her nose, stomach and from between her legs.

 The anger left his eyes, as the last bit of the drunken bliss of ignorance fell away from him. He suddenly felt a lot more sober than his body should have been and he felt very scared. Scared of what he had become capable of and scared of how badly Grell was hurt.

 "Oh lord. What the hell have I done!?" He lifted his foot back to the floor and sunk down on his knees next to her. He swept her back off the floor and pulled her to his chest with his arms. She shook in his arms, trying to get away from him. "Let go ... of me ... let me go."

 William didn't let her go, as he started to shake himself. "Grell, I'm so sorry."

 She glared up at him, fear mixing with anger. "Let go of me! If ... I were human that ... that would have killed me!" William's eyed filled with tears, heart beating faster as he realised she was right. He could have easily of just ended her life in a blizzard of his own stupid anger. He thanked his lucky stars that they were both reapers.

 He held her tighter. "I know. I ... I'm ... I'm a monster. Grell I ... I'm so sorry." Her movements stilled, as she succumbed to the pain sinking deep into her being. She felt sick and tired and very cold.

 "William do ... do you still love me? You didn't mean what you ... said earlier? Please tell me it wasn't true."

 William tried to rack his brain, to remember the conversation from a few minutes ago. "What I said?"

"That you hated me!"

 "Oh ... Lord no. I meant ... none of that."

 Grell lay her head against his chest, pain and blood loss making her body weak. "Just ... help me get cleaned up ... would you?"

 William staggered to his feet, a second wave of alcoholic affect hitting him. He pushed that feeling aside as best he could, as he helped Grell to her feet. They walked into the living room and he sat her down on the sofa.

 He walked into the kitchen, swaying slightly. He wet a few pieces of cloth and carried a small towel with him back into the living room. Grell was hunched over now, hand pressed against her stomach wound. Her face looked pale and she slipped further forward, gagging as she threw up onto the floor.

 William raced over to her, pushing her back gently against the back of the sofa. "Will ... I need to lie down ... feel dizzy.

 "You're not going to be sick again, are you?" He felt himself sober up almost completely, his reaper body quickly processing the alcohol and burning it up in his system.

 Grell whimpered slightly as pain shot up her rear and back. "No ... I don't think so." She lay her self down on the sofa, breathy shaky and body beginning to tremble uncontrollably.

 William went to lift her shirt up but her hand pushed his away. "No ... don't ... don't put your hands all over me!"

 "Grell, please." He urged. "I need to see how bad this cut is." She let her hand slip to her side, signalling for William to carry on with his actions. He lifted the material up and grimaced at the sight. It looked awful, skin torn messily from the twisting of the knife. The edges had started to bruise from the trauma and the hole was leaking more blood with every breath she took.

 She yelped as he started to clean it, before pressing a towel to the area to help clot the wound. He then took another wet cloth and wiped the small amount of blood from her nose, which had started to swell slightly from the force of being hit against the wall.

 "Will." Grell said, voice just a whisper.

 "Yes?"

 "There's some bandages ... In the kitchen drawer .... Top left. If not ... there's some up in the bathroom. When it stops bleeding as bad ... bandage me up."

"Of course."

 He went to lift her skirt up to assess the damage there. "Don't!" Grell managed weakly.

 "Why not? I need to see how badly you're injured." William's voice started to faulter with guilt.

 She shook her head slightly. "I ... don't want ... you to see that. You ... don't get to touch there ... you don't ... get ... to ... see that. I'll ... clean myself up there later ... wouldn't be the first ... t ... time I've had to.

 "V ... very ... well." William said, feeling shame stabbing him in the chest.

 After a good while of keeping the towel pressed against her puncture, the blood had started to clot and William had gone to grab the bandages. Grell lifted her back slightly to give William room to wrap the bandage tightly around her middle.

 "I'm ... so tired." Grell whispered. William went to sit next to her, moving her up slightly to rest her head on his lap. "You should sleep, your body needs rest."

 "You won't hurt me ... If I sleep?" She breathed, with worry etched into her voice.  

 William shook his head, tears starting to slip down his cheeks. "No. I won't hurt you. I'm ... so sorry my angel."

 "You need to stop this. Stop drinking ... It's just getting worse. I ... I can't handle this ... for much longer."

 "I'll never drink another drop. I couldn't live with myself if I did something ... like this ever again."

 Grells eyes slipped shut. "Please ... don't go back on those words ... promise me."

 "I promise."

 Grell fell to sleep at that point and after a while, William moved from under her carefully, resting a pillow under her head and going to get her a blanket.

 He then cleaned the small patch of vomit off of the floor and headed to the kitchen. He began to pour the last bit of alcohol he had in the kitchen down the sink. "I promise Grell. I love you so much."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just ordered the manga. 'Secret' first two volumes.


	5. Promises. Made to be broken?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't going to write this chapter but I thought the story needed filling out more. Plus Grell getting fired up is always nice.

 William had spent the next few hours with a chair from the kitchen pulled up next to the sofa. He sat watching his partner, adjusting his glasses anxiously every few minutes. His heart felt heavy with guilt, as he watched her sleeping, face pale and bruised. Still in disbelief over the night's events, he told himself this would never happen again. That he wouldn't let the sweet temptation of the liquor bring him to drink another drop. He hoped he had enough self control now for such a feat and with that he began to realise he may have a problem, an actual addiction.

 He stood up when he heard Grell start to whimper, as she moved around slightly on the seat. It looked as if she was having a nightmare. She shot up suddenly, eyes wide, before she began to heave dryly again. A small whine left her mouth, as bile was coughed up onto the blanket.

 William rushed over to her, kneeling down next to the sofa. "Are you okay?"

 "I ... I think I just had a nightmare ... ugh. " Her hand pulled the blanket back, hand going to the bandage, blood starting to seep through the material again. "It wasn't ... A nightmare?" She went wide eyed again, as the memories of the events of a few hours before crossed her mind.

 "I'm so sorry Grell. Oh, ... it looks like you've reopened this." His fingers graced over the bandage, making her shudder slightly. "I'll go get some more bandages." He moved the blanket off her and went to get another towel and some more wrappings for her wound. He also filled a glass with water for her.

 He handed the glass to her and she had a few sips, before giving it back to him. He unbuttoned her shirt and felt her tense. "It's okay, Grell. I just need better access to this wound." He unwrapped the bandage from her and pressed the towel back onto it. Grell tried to relax against his touch and let her eyes slip shut.

 A sharp pain shot up her bum and back and she yelped and jumped sightly on her seat. "Grell? What's the matter?"

 She looked away from him. "It's nothing."

 "Is it" William tried to broch the subject carefully. "Your other injury?"

 A few tears slipped from her eyes. "Yes." She didn't really want to answer the question but she knew that William had already guessed what her body was screaming at her. "When that stops bleeding, help me to the bathroom. I want to get this cleaned up. "

 "Are you sure it's wise to move so much in this condition?"

 Her head shot up, scowling at him. "Just do it, I wouldn't be in this mess if it wasn't for you!"

 "Ok ... as you wish." Once the wound on her stomach had stopped bleeding, taking a good ten minutes to even start to reclot, he bandaged her back up and helped her up the stairs to the bathroom.

 "Stay outside the door, I can handle this by myself."

"Are you sure?" He asked, concerned over leaving her in such a fragile state.

 "I'm sure. If I need you, I'll call you." She pushed the door open shakily and went to run the tap, grabbing two towels. She wet one and then pulled her skirt down slowly, carefully, to avoid reopening her stab wound for a second time.

 William sank down the door, head resting against the wood. He shut his eyes and tried to press the guilt from his mind. He could hear small whines and the occasional sob coming from inside the room. Then a loud bang sounded from behind the door, making him jump to his feet. He rushed into the room, without even bothering to knock and ask if Grell was okay.

 She had fallen, smacking her arm off the sink on her descent and was lying awkwardly on her back, trying to push herself back up on her elbows. William went to kneel down next to her and slowly helped her up into a sitting position.

 "I told you not to come in here, what the hell were you thinking!" She shrieked.

 William pushed his glasses up. "I know, but you've had a fall, I couldn't just leave you unable to get up."

 "You've had no trouble just leaving me in this sort of condition before." She barked.

 William felt his heart ache with shame. "I know ... but you need help cleaning up." He reached up and grabbed the cloth that was still on the sink.

 "No! I said I didn't want you to touch me! Get out! Just g-". Her words were cut off sharply by the other. 

 "Stop being so stubborn. Just let me help you! You can't even stand up by yourself, just let me help!" Grell looked at him with a frightened expression, obviously scared that outburst would end in violence again. William realised that he had just scared her even more and lowered his tone. "Sorry, I didn't mean to shout, just turn on your side and let me clean you up."

 She did as she was told and lay on her uninjured side. William scooted down and started to clean the dried blood from her. She tensed then after a while started to relax. The mess of bruised and torn skin at her entrance looked horrible and William felt himself tearing up at the sight. " Your ... still bleeding quite badly here, so we may be stuck in this position for a while." William stated, trying to sound more calm than he felt.

 "It's because you haven't given me a day to heal in the past week! I keep having to run to the bathroom at work, keeps bleeding, it's so bothersome ... and so pain ... painful."

 "I'm sorry. I ... erm poured the rest of the alcohol down the sink, while you were asleep." William said, trying to not think about her injuries.

 "Good. Just don't go buying anymore tonight." She said quietly, eyes beginning to slip shut in tiredness.

 "I won't, don't worry yourself." After what felt like forever, she had stopped bleeding and William had lifted her up and carried her now sleeping form into the bedroom. He lay them both in bed and then pulled the covers over them both, snuggling back up to her as best he could without pressing into any area that may bleed again.

 He didn't get any sleep that night. He kept thinking of the alcohol, how it would ease his guilt at this very moment but also how he couldn't let himself touch another drop. This had gone too far and he wouldn't let himself cause his love any more damage. At least he prayed he was strong enough, to not turn back on his words when things got rough.

 Getting out of bed for work at around half six am, he got himself showered and ready for work. Then he went down to the nearest bakery around half seven, when they had just opened. He brought a giant slice of bread pudding and the took it back to his house. He left it on the kitchen table for Grell, along with a note. Then he ported off to work.


	6. Hugs.

 Grell awoke at ten the next morning, still in a sort of daze. Her mind was reeling from the events of the previous night. She couldn't believe William had hurt her so badly. Still, she willed herself to believe his promise of not drinking ever again and went to get herself ready.

 As soon as she moved from the bed, she felt blood starting to creep down her legs. She cursed her body for not healing yet, the wounds getting irritated and reopening. She had to change her pants three times that morning before she finally managed to stem the bleeding with a towel. Her stab wound wasn't fairing much better, blood starting to stain the bandage as she made her way downstairs.

 She was able to cease the bleeding while hunched over in the kitchen, in the same way as before and then wrapped herself in a clean bandage. She had brought a few more spare pairs of pants to take in her bag to work. She'd also covered her bruised nose with makeup. 

 That's when she noticed the pudding and note on the kitchen table. She took a few wobbly steps closer to eye the note William had left her. "Grell- I love you so much. Words cannot express my sorrow at last night's events. I promise tonight will be the start of happier times. Please eat this morning. You need your strength. Lots of love, William."

 She smiled slightly at the loveliness of the note but her heart still ached not knowing if his words would turn into truth. Also, she felt sick to her stomach and decided to leave the pudding untill she got home. She instead made herself a cup of coffee and then sat down, wincing as her stomach bent to take her seat.

 As she got into work, she looked at her ledger. Today was a busy day for reapings. Grell cussed inside, knowing she'd be lucky to get through the day without bleeding again and possibly passing out.

 The first few reaperings were just a single soul which she would collect on her own, but the last couple were multiple souls, one from a factory fire and the other from a train accident. For those, she would be accompanied by her best friend Ronald. Maybe he would be able to cheer her up? Still, she worried he may notice something was wrong.

 The first three collections went well, she was careful not to let her wounds bleed. On the fourth reaping, she felt a wave of dizziness hit her and she grabbed onto a fence near a row of shops, for support. It was also the street where the Undertaker worked, in his small funeral parlour.

 "Oh me' dear rose, whatever has happened to you." She straighten up and turned slowly, to see the Undertaker standing there, his usual grin faded into a worried grimace.

 "A ... Adrian, what are you doing here?" He walked up to her, almost touching skin to skin.

 "Well I do work around here rose. I saw you looking all pale, so I came to see what was going on with the little princess."

 "Nothing, I'm fine"

 "Oh my dear but you really aren't. I've been watching you. You're wilting before my eyes. Tell me, has chilly Willy been acting like a brute? Has he roughed up your pretty little feathers?" He wrapped his arms around Grell.

 "What the hell are you doing!?" Get away from me, you old creep!" She shouted, but she didn't move away.

 "Giving ye' a little comfort, isn't that what the little rose needs right now?" He was right, Grell did need someone to hug her at this moment. Just someone to be there for her. She wrapped her arms around him and cuddled into him slightly. Tears left her eyes.

 The Undertaker spoke again. "See, you just need a hug is all. I'm sure Willy will see sense soon, my dear."

 "Yes, he will." She pulled away then. "I have to go now, Adrian. Thanks, I guess."With that, she wiped her eyes and ported to her next assigment.

 The Undertaker looked at the spot where she was previously standing. "I sure hope he does, before ye' wilts away for good. I'll be seeing you again, me lil' rose."

 Grell had ported to the front of a factory, waiting for the explosion. Ronald appeared next to her. "Hey babe, how have y' been?"

 She smiled at him softly. "I'm okay thank you, how are you, my darling?"

 Ronald shrugged his shoulders. "Alright I guess. Going to dump tha' girl tomorow though, she's such a pain in tha' Arse. Er... y' sure y' ok?" He had noticed how her hand was pressed into her side, face contorting in slight pain.

 "I'm okay, I've just got stitch." She breathed.

 Ronald giggled. "Oh? Has Will been too frisky?" At that moment there was a loud explosion and Ronald turned around to look at it, not noticing the tears forming in Grell's eyes at his last comment.

 They went about collecting the many souls on their list and Grell went to stamp the last name on her ledger. She was standing on a wooden bar in the cieling and as she shut her ledger, the bar gave way. She fell twenty feet onto the chard ground and hit her rear sharply.

 That's when she felt it. Her weakened skin splitting again. Blood started to seep out of her and down onto the trousers she was wearing.

 "Grell! Y' alright, tha' sure was a nasty fall." Knox said, worried as he ran up behind her.

 "Nothing a die hard reaper can't handle." She said, standing up on shaky legs. She needed to get back to the branch to patch herself back up again. She knew the blood was probably visible through the beige colour she was wearing on her legs and she wished she'd have had a darker pair clean, to wear.

 "We should head back ... to branch Ronnie". Her vision started to blur, as the pain inside her body increased.

 "Erm, babe? You're...bleeding?" He said, noticing the blood staining her bum and legs. She turned around to face him. "I'm fine, I ju-." The world around her faded to black, the last image in her mind being of Ronald's face turning to one of shock and horror.


	7. Infirmary.

She could feel Ronald, as he picked her up and pulled her over his shoulder. Everything had turned to pitch blackness and she didn't even know if she was still awake or not. If what was happening was really a dream or reality. Then she heard Ronald's voice and wetness against her side. Her stab wound had also began to bleed. "Jus' hang in there babe, I'm takin' y' to tha' infirmary."

 She slipped into unconsciousness again and when her senses returned, the room looked like a blur of white. She could feel the bed against her back, hard springs digging in slightly. Sounds began to form into coherent sentences. The female repear could make out Ronald's voice as well as the Dr's.

 "What the 'ell happened to 'er?"

 "I'm not sure Mr Knox, it looks as though she received these Injuries yesterday and the fall has caused them to tear slightly and bleed again."

 "I know tha' bu' where she's bleedin' from." He paused. "Who could 'av done such a thing?"

 The Dr sighed. "I have no idea. You should maybe ask her yourself when she wakes up, if she wants to talk about this. I've tended to the wound on her stomach but I wanted to wait for her to be conscious, before I treated her other injury. It's quite a delicate matter. When I asked you to step outside, I did assess her and she's in quite a bad way. Is there anything you know which could shed light on what has happened?"

 "Well ..." Ronald began. "She's been actin' a little upset th' past few days and she's been kinda' pale and ill lookin'. But nothin' really."

 Grell started to stir completely at that point and tried to sit up on her elbows. The shooting pain stopped her midway and she fell back on the bed with a whine. Ronald went and held her hand. "Grell? Who tha' 'ell did this to y'! I'm worried about y' babe."

 Tears pricked at her eyes as she felt shameful for the situation she was in. She didn't want Ronald to know what she had been put through. She knew how angry he would be. "I ... it doesn't matter, Ronnie ... I'm okay." 

 Sudden realisation dawned on Knox's expression. "Oh my god ... don't tell me ... it was William?! Please talk t' me Grell, I'm so worried babe. Please jus' tell me wha' happened."

 "Ronnie, please ... don't get angry ... he was just-"

 Ronald cut her off mid sentence. "What tha' 'ell! He seriously raped y'? Then stabbed y' by the looks of it and ya' still trying to defend him? I'm gunna' go teach 'im a lesson." He jumped up and stormed out the room.

 "Ronnie ... don't, please!" She tried to sit up again but her body screamed at her and she gave up, lying back down, as sobs started to echo around the room. She was scared of what Ronald would do when he found William. More than that though, she was scared of what it would make William do. The redhead hoped with even fiber of her being that he wouldn't be turning to liquor tonight.

 Ronald barged into William's office and as the supervisor turned around, a fist collided with his cheek and he was knocked off his chair. "Bastard! What the 'ell do y' think ya' doing hurtin' Grell like that, y' piece of shit!"

 Ronald bent down and gripped William's collar, punching him in the face with his other hand several more times. Three, four, five more, again and again, until William's nose was bleeding and his one cheek had swollen. "She's in th' infirmary because of you!"

 "What?"

 Ronald let him go and looked down at him. "Those cuts you gave 'er ay' healin' properly. What do you think you're playin' at takin' your anger out on 'er. What's she eva' done t' y'!"

 William adjusted his glasses and stood up, wiping the blood away from his nose with his hand. "I know that reaper Knox and I have come to regret my actions from last night completely. However, you do not get to come in here and cause a ruckus. You do not know the details."

 "Then tell me. Don't think y' can hurt my best friend and not give me a bloody reason." Ronald's fists clenched in anger but also in sadness. He didn't hate this man, instead he looked up to him in a way and couldn't believe he would do such a thing.

 "Reaper Knox, I think It would be best if you moved aside and let me go see my partner now." William said, adjusting his glasses.

 Ronald shook his head. "No way! At least tell me why y' did it. Then y' can go see 'er and don't even think of layin' another finger on 'er."

 William sighed, realising he wasn't going to get out of the room in one piece without giving Ronald an explanation. Still, he was ashamed to admit what he had done. "I ... erm."

"Erm what? Jus' tell me! I want t' help y' both, if I can."

 "Well the simple explanation is that I have developed a ... a drinking problem."

 "Oh." Ronald's mouth fell open. He wasn't expecting that in the slightest. "Well ... why?"

 "Those are personal matters of which I do not wish to speak of at this present moment. All you need to know is that I lashed out at Grell while drunk on whiskey. I regret my actions completely and do not intend to take another sip of that vile substance ever again. Now I must be going to the infirmary. Will you be accompanying me?"

 "Yes boss." Ronald said, with a long sigh. 'What a situation to be stuck right in the middle of', he thought to himself.

 They left to head back to Grell's room. The doctor stopped them as they went to go in through the door. "Mr Spears, I will need to have a word with you, after your visit. She's in a very vulnerable state of mind right now. Please be gentle on her."

 William nodded, before he pushed the door open. "Yes, sir."

 He saw Grell curled up on her uninjured side, hands pressed over her face, as she cried into them. He rushed over to her and soothed her hair. "Grell? Please don't cry."

 She turned to face him, eyes going wide. "Will, your ... your face!." She moved her hands away from her face and William helped her to turn and sit up.

 He sat behind her, wrapping his arm around her chest, careful not to push down on the wound under his arm. "My face will be fine, don't worry. I'm so sorry you are hurt and had to be brought here."

 At that point the doctor entered the room again, with Ronald. "She's free to go home. I have patched up all her injuries, before you came in Mr Spears. Ronald please take her home, so she can rest. I need to speak with Mr Spears before his shift finishes in a few hours.

 Ronald did as he was told and took Grell home. "Can I get y' anythin'? Tea?"

 She shook her head. "No,  just help me upstairs, so I can sleep. Then go back to work, I'll be fine here on my own."

 "Are y' sure?"

 "Yes, I'll be okay, please don't worry." She yawned, her body aching. He helped her up to the bedroom and pulled the covers back for her to lie down. Pulling the covers back up, he turned to leave. "Oh and Grell?"

 "Hmm Ronnie?"

 "If he hurts y' again, you're free to stay at mine, for as long as y' need." With that he ported back to work.


	8. Doctor's advice.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so hard to write.

 William's head was pounding as he made his way back to the office. Both from being punched senseless and from his discussion with the doctor. He'd had to tell the doctor about his issue as well. Though he didn't want to, he knew it was for the best.

 Hopefully with his guidance, he'd be able to stay on track. The doctor had told him that he would be free if William ever needed support. Though William wasn't a man good with asking for or accepting help, he was glad for the offer. At least he wouldn't be alone with his issues and Grell wouldn't have to take the brunt of his upset again.

 The doctor had also explained that Grell's wounds didn't seem to be healing as quickly as they should be. Not because she was constantly moving but because her body was under stress. Though reaper bodies heal at a faster pace than humans, stress on the body can still slow this down slightly, just like with a human body. That, coupled with the fact that she'd been made to bleed for many days in a row, made her wounds fail to knit together as they should have.

 That fact alone was enough to make William's heart ache. Knowing he was the cause of not only the injuries but also of her stress. As he got back to his desk, he put his head in his hands and let the tears fall. The guilt was eating him up and he felt he couldn't deal with it sober. Still, William knew drinking tonight may end their relationship for good. Grell had said it herself, she couldn't take much more of such a dire situation. He didn't know how he would cope with seeing her tonight, her body broken by his hands alone.

 Needless to say, William didn't get much paperwork done during his last few work hours. He left work, the temptation of drinking overpowering his judgement. He went to the nearest liquor store to his house, to get a drink. His hand wavered, unsure of his own thoughts and actions. Unsure of the outcome of his decision. He then picked up a bottle of whisky as well as a bottle of vodka and payed for them. On the way home he was knocked over by a man. A man he knew very well.

 He got home and went upstairs to see Grell still asleep. She looked so sad, even in peaceful slumber. He went back down to the kitchen and opened his whisky. Several hours passed and he headed back upstairs. Grell was awake now, propped up awkwardly on a pillow. "You didn't eat the bread pudding I brought for you earlier. I asked you to eat it, I told you that you needed strength for today."

 Her face contorted in fear, eyes becoming wide. "I know ... I felt sick ... Please don't be mad Will." She was expecting him to lash out again but he didn't, instead sitting on the bed next to her and cupping her chin. The male pulled her into a tender kiss and she melted into the action, hands going to grip his suit shirt. She was surprised and thankful to note his breath had no trace of alcohol on it. "

 "You ... kept your promise?" She asked, as their kiss parted.

 "No I didn't, I brought it. It's in the kitchen."

 Her eyes filled with tears. "Oh ... but-"

 He cut her sentence off. "I couldn't drink it ... I had a visit from someone on the walk back here."

"Oh? By who?"

 William sighed and adjusted his glasses. "The Undertaker. He told me not to hurt you. He said to consider my decision before I threw my chance at saving our relationship away."

 Grell opened her mouth to speak but the words died in her throat. She tried again. "Adrian told you that? I'm glad ... you didn't drink that vile stuff ... Thank you."

 "I'll be throwing it away when I go back downstairs."

 Her hands gripped his shirt tighter. "No ... don't go yet. Stay here with me for a bit, please?"

 "Very well". He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her as close as he was able to, without causing her injuries further damage.

 She slid down slightly to rest her head on his chest. "Will?"

 "Yes?" He asked, kissing the top of her head.

 Grell spoke, before yawning. "I love you."

 "I love you too. Are you still tired?" He asked.

 "Very, my darling."

 He kissed the top of her head again. "Then please rest. I'll stay here with you until you fall asleep." They both lay down and she soon fell back into slumber.

 William got out of bed and went back downstairs. He eyed the liquor once more, once again tempted to drink it, before he shook the awful temptation from his mind and tipped the liquid down the sink. He sat at the kitchen table, thinking of all he had done and all he had to do to make things right again. He was glad that they both had the day off work tomorow.


	9. Nightmares.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter has a twist.

 William stirred suddenly from his slumber, frightful images of his previous nightmare flashing before his eyes. Blood. So much blood. A knife. A slit throat. So much awful blood. Mixed with splayed read hair. A lifeless body at his feet. He was sitting in a kitchen chair, sweat running down his brow.

 He stood up quickly and ran up to the bedroom, willing his love to be unharmed. Willing those images to really be just an awful nightmare. He pushed the bedroom door open and sighed in relief. Grell was lay peacefully, wrapped up tightly in the bed sheets. He walked over and lay down on top of the bed covers, as to not disturbed his sleeping partner. Small snores were falling from her lips. He let his eyes drift shut, the sound lulling him back into sleep.

 He awoke again around ten am, Grell still sound asleep. He went to get showered and then went downstairs go make himself something to eat. He then made Grell a cup of tea and checked to make sure the bread pudding hadn't dried out, before he went back to the bedroom. He called her name softly, as he placed the food and tea on the bedside table.

 She rolled over on the bed and sat up slowly, mindful of her injuries. William bent down and kissed her on the forehead. "Morning, my love."

 She yawned softly. "Morning, Will." Her stomach make a rumbling noise and William moved the paper bag with the pudding in onto her lap. "You should eat. You didn't eat a thing yesterday."

 She opened the bag and pulled the pudding out, taking a hungry bite. "Hmm, this is lovely. My favorite. Thank you William." Her brow furrowed slightly. "Why aren't you at work?"

 "It's our day off, remember?" He said, as he sat down on the very edge of the bed next to her.

 "Yes, but you always go in anyway, to get extra work done."

 He brushed a few stray hairs from her face. "Yes, I know. However I want to spend the day with you. You are more important than paperwork." She smiled slightly, before tucking into the rest of her pudding. They sat in silence for a while.

 William then handed her the cooling tea and she drank it quickly, thankful for the energy the sugar was beginning to give her. She finally spoke. "What do you want to do today?"

 William adjusted his glasses. "Well I'd like to see how your injuries are healing at present." She nodded, slight worry crossing her face at William touching her properly. William noticed and spoke again. "If you're okay with my touch, that is."

 She didn't speak for a few moments, then spoke of her decision. "I need a shower anyway, help me to the bathroom?" He did as directed and noticed how her movements weren't as pained. She noticed too, how the stab wound didn't start to bleed as soon as she stood up.

 When they got into the bathroom he helped her take her top and trousers off. "Will, please ... turn around. I don't want you seeing ..." He paused for a moment and then did as asked. She took her pants off, then unwrapped her bandage and noticed how the cut seemed to have started to knit together. It had scabbed over and the wound looked neat.

 She stepped into the shower and washed herself, careful to not let the water fall on her injured side. The pain between her legs had also subsided and she carefully washed the area. Thankfully, it didn't bleed again. "Will, can you get me a change of clothes? Underwear, a shirt and that thin red jumper please?" She asked, from inside of the shower. 

 "Sure. I'll be back at once." He soon returned and as she turned the water off and opened the door slightly, he handed her a towel. He turned back around, as she got dried off and redressed.

 "Okay, you can turn around now. This looks like it's healing well." She said, lifted her top up. He examined the cut.

 "Yes, it looks to be healing wonderfully." William pulled her into a gentle kiss and then they headed downstairs. William picked up yesterday's newspaper, as Grell immersed herself in a romance novel. She soon grew tired again and lay down, head resting on William's lap.

 They spent the day just relaxing at their home, eating lunch and then cuddling up in bed together. She lay against his chest and he drew soothing patterns on the back of her jumper with his fingers. They went to sleep early that night, cuddled in each others arms.

 William looked down at his sleeping beauty, thinking how lucky he was to still have her. Inside though, he felt genuinely scared. He'd been thinking of alcohol all day and prayed work tomorow would be a welcomed distraction. That he'd be able to quell the urge to drink that was inside of him, with endless paperwork and collection duties. He needed to stay strong for this woman, that he loved with all his heart.


	10. Changes

As the morning came into view, Grell's injuries had almost completely healed, the scabs starting to fade into scars. As such, she headed to work, after reading another sweet note William had left for her in the kitchen.

 The day went without a hitch and even though it had been full of collections, Grell's body was fairing well. There was no pain and by the time she returned to her desk to start paperwork, the wounds were nothing but light scars. She was glad that the pain and worry of having to constantly check for a new bleed had disappeared.

 Ronald had been coming to see her, almost every hour, to make sure she was still okay. To make sure William hadn't lashed out at her again. Nothing of the sort had transpired but she still couldn't completely relax. She was still worried William would slip back into old habits. They did die hard after all, so was the saying.

 After work, Grell returned home to find a meal prepared for the two of them. William pulled her into a hug and kissed her passionately. He held her tightly and that's when she realised William was crying. She pulled away and looked him in the eyes. "Will? What's the matter?"

 He wiped his eyes and straightened up. "It's nothing, I'm quite alright."

 "William, please tell me." She went to hug him again but he backed away.

 "I said it was nothing! I do not wish to discuss it." His tone was slightly raised and almost angry sounding. He realised this and lowered it again. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap. Can we please just eat?"

 They ate in awkward silence, worry making Grell's stomach churn painfully. The rest of the night transpired in much the same way and as they lay in bed, not a word was uttered between the two.

 The next day at work William didn't come in to bring her tea and she got more worried. He was burying himself in even more paperwork than usual and she was scared he would soon snap under all the pressure. Also that day, Ronald had told her that he had finally broke up with his girlfriend. He also stated that she had 'given him hell' over it and said he would come to regret it. He just shrugged his shoulders and said she didn't scare him, she was just a crazed, clingy girl.

 At home that night, William barely spoke a word and Grell became even more worried. She knew what he was probably thinking about, the temptation that was probably clawing at him. She wanted to ask him about the issue but she didn't dare to. She knew how badly bringing up the subject always ended.

 He seemed distant even when he did speak, like his mind was clouded with other matters. Even when he said he loved her that night, before they fell asleep, he didn't seem like he was really there in that moment. Like his thoughts were on more displeasing topics. As she tried to sleep, frightened tears slipped from her eyes. She was scared that tomorow might be the day that everything fell apart again.

 Tomorow came too quickly for her liking and her heart ached when there was no note left for her by her love. Nevertheless, work seemed to be going well. Her reapings had gone without incident and her ledger was being filled with completed names.

 On one of her assigments, near the Undertaker's place of business, she decided to pay him a visit. He had helped her in her time of need, without even being asked to do so and she wanted to thank him.

 She walked into the building and looked around for the Undertaker. "Oh me dear rose is here to see me, how sweet." He said, as he pushed open a coffin and stepped out of it. He walked over and pulled her into a hug. She didn't pull away. It was a nice feeling, being comforted by the older reaper. As strange as it seemed, the gesture made her feel somewhat safe.

 "I just came to say thank you for talking to William."

 He hugged her tighter. "Oh it was me pleasure, lovely. Anything to help a sweet thing such a yourself. Is Willy behaving himself? Is he treating you better? "

 "He is, thank you."

 He pulled away then and gave her a quick looking over. "Well you seem to be looking better, me dear. If you ever be needing my assistance again, I'll be right over there in that coffin. He gestured over to the coffin he was previously hidden in.

 She smiled slightly. "Yes I will. I must be off now, before the soul I'm due to reap runs away from me. Have a nice day." With that, she ported off into the street again.

 That's when the Undertaker's smile faded. "Yes me little rose, you may be needing of my help sooner than you realise."

 Grell finished up her collections for the day and headed back to branch. At four o'clock, she and Ronald sat down for lunch in the large canteen. A few minutes into their relaxed conversation, a flustered looking Luke Tate ran up to them.

 He was a small man, who had just become a fully fledged reaper. He had short spiky hair and was usually timid. When he spoke however, his voice was full of urgency. "Ron, Miss Sutcliff! I need to tell you something!"

 Ronald looked up at him, confused. "What's tha' matta'?"

 Luke let himself catch his breath for a second, then spoke. "That girl you were seeing, she's been spreading rumours about you and Grell sleeping together while you were with her."

 "What?" Grell shrieked, jumping to her feet.

 "Mr Spears was in the break room when she was talking. He heard the whole thing. He rushed off, I tried to catch him up to explain that it was all lies but he locked himself in his office before I had a chance to speak to him. He looked really angry."

 Grell's stomach flipped at hearing this. She felt like her life had just crashed into burning rubble. Ronald grunted angry, before speaking. "Grell, y' should stay at mine tonight. It's not safe for y' to go home."

 Her head shot down to look at him. "What good would that do? It'll just make William even more angry. I've got to go home tonight and explain."

 "But-." Before Ronald could say another word, she had rushed out of the room. She ran to her office and locked her own door, sitting down and crying. This just couldn't be happening. Everything had just fallen apart. She stayed locked in that room, sobbing her heart out, until her shift ended.

 William had gone home at five, grabbing a handful of whisky bottles on his way. He was so angry. He couldn't believe what he had heard. Part of him knew that it was probably untrue but he had let his temptation swallow him. He needed a reason to drink. A reason to drown his sorrows, worries and regrets in the sweet poison he had just raised to his lips. He drank it hungrily, letting the world around him fade into drunken bliss.


	11. Pain.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Awful chapter. Pretty gruesome. Can skip if you wish.

 With baited breath and a shaking hand, Grell opened the door to her home. She locked it and took a few wobbly steps into the hallway. This was a good sign, not being shoved against the nearest wall like last time.

 She made it into the living room without incident, William not being present there. She then headed to the kitchen and her heart almost stopped in her chest. Many empty whisky bottles lined the kitchen table. Too many. She gulped, wanting nothing more than to run as far away from this house as she could. Grell knew that wasn't an option, she had to go see if William was okay. She had to try and help him and hope she wouldn't get hurt in the process.

 She checked the bathroom but he wasn't in there either. That only room left was the bedroom. Breathing out a scared, shaky breath, she pushed open the door.

 A hand gripped her hair and she was dragged over to the bed. "William! Wait! What you heard ... it wasn't ... wasn't true."

 "Shut up! I've had enough of all you lies! Filthy cow." Her face collided with the bed covers, as she was shoved down onto the bed and the man's weight sank onto her back.

 "William stop it! This isn't-." A piece of cloth was tied around her mouth and fastened. She rolled over sharply, using her arms to propel her up and knocked William off of her. He jumped back on her and pushed her back against the bed, sitting down on her chest.

 Her hands flew up to try to push him off but he grabbed one of her wrists and tied it to the bed with what looked like a long, torn piece of one of her shirts. Her other hand shot up and punched him in his face. He grunted angrily, before he grabbed her other arm and tied that one in much the same way, to the bed frame.

 Tears slipped from her eyes as he pulled a knife from his coat pocket and pressed it against her neck. "You're just a little slut. How dare you embarrass me like this! I'm going to cut you up so badly no one will ever want you again. No one will ever come and tempt you away from me!"

 She tried to reply but all that could be heard were muffled screams. He pulled the knife away and slid down onto her legs. She tried to twist them out from under him but it was no use, he was too heavy.

 He ripped her top open and pressed the tip of the knife to her small scar. She shut her eyes tight as that same sharp, painful sensation ripped through her body. The knife was twisted around and sank deeper into her flesh. Blood sprung up under the blade and flowed across her skin. The knife was withdraw and shoved into the dip under her rib.

 Her arms pulled against her restraints. Pain set her body on fire, as silenced whimpers fell from her lips. Soon, blood pooled around her onto the bed sheets, as more punctures along with deep slices were carved up her chest and stomach.

 Her vision started to cloud from blood loss. Her limbs stilled, as agony overtook her, weakening any fight still left within her. She felt her bottoms and pants being removed and the knife carving into her thighs. Sloppy, blooded words were etched into her. 'Slut', 'whore' and the like.

 Her hips were lifted up from the bed and her legs pulled open harshly. Tears slipped from glassy eyes. The last thing she felt was a sharp pain ripping her from inside, before she fainted from the pain and loss of blood.


	12. Patchwork.

 As blackness faded to reveal reality, pain shot through the female reaper's body. Soft sobs and broken sounding words echoed around the room, catching her attention. "Oh ... what have I done. So much blood. What ... why? I'm a monster."

 She tried to move but her body felt stiff with agony, unable to even shift an inch. She could just barely twist her hands and that's when she realised they were no longer tied to the bed frame. Instead they lay limply at the sides of her head. Her mouth was also no longer gagged. She opened her mouth slightly, feeling blood run down her chin. Had he really cut her so deep, as to puncture her insides? She would surely be dead by now if she were human.

 A small whimper was all that passed her lips. It was enough, William hearing it between his sobs. He stood up and raced over the her, the alcohol in his system almost completely burnt up. He sat on the bed and pulled her broken frame into his arms. She yelped, as pain shot under her rib and from between her legs. "Oh, Grell. I'm so ... sorry. I was so scared, it's passed midnight and ... you wouldn't open your eyes. I tried for an ... hour to wake you."

 The blood from her injuries was seeping into his shirt, no other clothes left on his body. She tried to speak but all that could be heard was a hoarse whimper. She coughed as more blood ran from between her lips.

 "You're bleeding so badly. So ... much blood. I ... I need to get you treatment immediately." She shook her head slightly, tears slipping from her eyes. She didn't want to be moved, it hurt too much.

 "I ...," she managed before William's face faded and she slipped into unconsciousness once more.

 William's eyes went wide. "Grell! No ... Please stay awake! Please don't go away again. Please ... hold on!" Panic overtook his senses and he lay her back down on the bed before grabbing a pair of trousers and pulling a blanket from the wardrobe to cover her. He picked her back up and ported them both to the infirmary.

 He raced to the desk in the main hall, a short brunette nurse sitting there. Her face turned to one of horror at the sight. The normally pristine reaper being covered in blood, a small redhead in his arms, blood seeping through the blanket.

 "Where's Doctor Cole? I need his help, now!" William all but shouted at her.

 The nurse stood up. "He's at home right now, he won't be back on duty until 6am. Please follow me." She guided him to a small room in the infirmary, with just a bed and medical supplies lining the walls. "What happened to her?" The nursed asked.

 "I erm ... She was stabbed. Please just help her." William said, as he lay his love onto the bed sheets.

 The nursed moved to unwrap the blanket carefully. "Can you please wait outside."

 "What, why?" William asked, starting to get angry. He needed to stay here with her. It was all his fault, he couldn't just leave her.

 "So I can work without distraction. The quicker I assess the extent of the injuries, the better." She turned to walk and opened the door for him. "I'll call you back in as soon as I have assessed her condition and have made sure she is stable."

 William left, wavering at the door before stepping out. The nurse shut the door and walked to take some medical supplies from a box on the nearest wall. As he pealed the blanket back completely, she cringed. There was blood everywhere. She cleaned the most severe looking wounds first, the stab to Grell's stomach and the deep puncture under her rib. Once she stemed the bleeding, she stitched the wounds up. Whatever was causing her internal bleeding would heal first and it had appeared to already be doing so.

 She then moved the look at the cuts on her chest and shoulders and then on Grell's legs. The words carved into the reapers legs made her stomach churn with concern. This was no accident caused by a demon, while she was out on assigment. It was obvious abuse and the blood leaking from under the redheads bottom just solidified that theory.


	13. Treatment and advice.

 After the nurse had finished treating Grell, she headed out the door to go speak to William. William turned to look up at her, from the chair he was sitting on in the hallway, as he heard her footsteps nearing. “Is … she okay? Is she going to be okay?”

 The nurse took the seat next to William, turning to look him straight in the eyes. “She’s stable. She did have some internal bleeding but once I had cleaned the wound, I saw that it had begun to heal. That’s how our bodies work; they heal the more severe wounds first, then focus on any other trauma. Hopefully the two large stab wounds will begin to heal next. At the moment she is still asleep and I cannot estimate how long it will be before her body has rested enough for her to wake up again. If she heals properly, she will make a full recovery.”

 William breathed a sigh of relief. “I'm so glad to hear it.”

 The nurse eyed him for a second before she spoke again. “How exactly did her injuries come about? I know it wasn’t a stab wound from a demon attack. She had too much trauma on other parts of her body for that to be the case.”

 William looked away. “Well … I …” He stopped talking, unable to find the words to admit the awful act he had committed.

 “Your name is Mr Spears, if I can recall? I know this is a tender subject but did you do this to her?”

 William put his head in his hands, tears slipping from his eyes. “Yes … my actions were … the cause of this. Dr Cole knows the full details of our… situation.”

 The nurse thought for another moment, before speaking again. “He will be here in five hours. For the time being, I have to ask you to go back home. I cannot allow you to be here with her, after what you have told me.”

 William looked up at the nurse, tears still falling from his eyes. “No, I can’t possible leave her alone in this condition. She needs me there with her.”

 “With all that has happened, it would not be wise for you to be around her. I am debating what action to take next and whether I should get the council involved in such matters. If those cuts were from a death scythe and not a normal weapon, she could be clinging to life right now. Such violence is serious misconduct. Please go home and consider your actions. You may return to speak to Dr Cole when his shift starts.” The nurse paused for a moment. “I'm very sorry.”

 William had no choice, he could very well be in a lot of trouble. With a great deal of difficulty, he accepted the nurse’s words and returned home. When he got home he went to the bedroom and at seeing all the blood on the bed sheets, began to cry harder. He pulled one of Grell’s dresses from the wardrobe and sank down onto the floor in the corner of the room. He held on to the item tightly for some sort of comfort, as his world fell apart around him. He got no sleep from 1am until 5.30am, when he got himself cleaned up and headed back to the infirmary to speak to the doctor.


	14. Punch.

 The doctor was in the hallway waiting for William to arrive. It was just after six am and he always came in slightly early, in case there was anything the nurse needed to pass onto him before her shift ended. He was worried that William would drink again and end up hurting Grell. However, he did not foresee just how badly she would be injured or the brutality of the attack. The nurse had commented on how Grell was still sleeping and once William arrived, the doctor planned to go check up on her. As William appeared in the hallway, Dr Cole addressed him straight away. “Mr Spears, I have been waiting for you to arrive. The nurse has informed me of the events of last night. Please follow me.”

 To William’s surprise, the doctor took him straight to Grell’s room. She looked awful, bandaged from her chest downwards and incredible pale. “How is she doing, doctor?”

 The doctor looked at him carefully. “Her condition is still stable, however the nurse has informed me that her injuries do not seem to be even starting to heal again. As I'm sure you can recall from our previous conversation, it is probably because she is stressed. We cannot say much more until she wakes up and we have no idea when that will be. It may be days before her body has recovered enough for her to regain consciousness. The trauma she was suffered is quite severe.”

  William walked closer to the bed and held her hand softly. Her wrists were bruised angrily from the ties he had placed around them. “I'm so sorry Grell, I never meant for any of this to … happen. Please … forgive me.” His words turned to hard sobs and his legs buckled. He hit the ground hard with Grell’s hand still in his own.

 The doctor moved to kneel down next to him. “You should sit down.” He helped him onto the chair at the side of the bed. “Now, I'm afraid we need to have a serious talk. You can’t keep putting yourself through this and Miss Sutcliff cannot take any more of your abuse.”

 “Okay” William said, through his sobs as he prepared for the worst conversation of his life.

 ----------

 William walked in to work an hour later than usual. His eyes were puffy behind his glasses and his breath was still shaky. The doctor had told him to come and see either him or one of nurse’s, if he had the urge to drink. He also explained that until Grell woke up, it was best for him to stay at work and try to focus on his collections. Keeping his mind busy would be the best option.

 He walked into his office and sat down at his desk, trying to rid his mind of the guilt and worry that was consuming him. He wanted nothing more than to drink at that very moment but he tried to push that temptation away. He knew giving in was not an option this time, if he allowed himself to do so, he couldn’t imagine to consequences. He began to do paperwork and it eased his urge somewhat but he decided it would be wise to go and see the doctor in his dinner break. To see Grell.

 Just before his dinner break at half one, there was a loud bang on the door. He looked over at the source of the sound. “Enter.”

 Ronald walked into the office quickly and saw how William’s eyes were red from previous tears. “Oh my God, William, wha’ ‘ave y’ done? Where’s Grell? She’s not come inta’ work.”

 William adjusted his glasses, unwanted tears slipping down his cheeks. “she’s … in the infirmary.”

Ronald walked up to him and grabbed his collar tightly. “What the ‘ell ‘ave y’ done to her?!” He shouted at the top of his lungs.

 “I do not … wish to discuss that. If you want to know, go visit her.” He received a punch to his nose, as Ronald stormed back out of the room, cusses flying from his mouth and fists clenched tightly.

Ronald quickly ported to the hallway of the infirmary. He had wanted to punch William in the face until he received a proper answer but Grell was hurt and checking on her condition was the most important issue at that moment.  


	15. Wake me up.

 William glanced at the clock on his office wall about ten minutes after Ronald had left. It was time to see how Grell was. To see if she had woken up yet. William highly doubted this would be the case; the doctor would surely have come to inform him if she had awoken. He was anxious about going to the infirmary, as he was pretty sure Ronald would still be there and that would probably mean another assault of punches.

 He stepped into the hallway of the infirmary, just as the doctor came out of the room Grell was stationed in. William approached the doctor. “How is she? Has there been any improvement to her condition?”

 The doctor shook his head sadly. “No, she has still yet to wake up and I'm afraid her wounds are still not healing. They have continued to bleed and although the stitched sights are not bleeding, she has once again lost quite a lot of blood. We are going to give her more fluids and pain medication to try to ease the stress on her body. Would you like to see her now?”

 “Yes I would, thank you.” The doctor led him to the room, where he saw Ronald sitting on the chair by the bed, gently holding her hand. William walked in, expecting Ronald to fly into a rage but he didn't, instead just looking up to give William a sad smile.

 The doctor shut the door and walked further into the room. “I have declined to tell Mr Knox about the incidents leading up to Miss Sutcliff’s current condition, as he is neither a relation to her nor in a relationship with her. I have however, informed him about her current medical state.” He walked over and changed to bag that was attached to a drip in her other hand.

 Ronald looked at William again. “I want t' know wha' happened last night.”

 William sighed and adjusted his glasses. “I don’t much care if you end up finding out the details of what transpired last night, being as you are her closest friend. However I do not wish to recount such awful events.”

 “Then give tha' doctor permission ta’ tell me.”

 The doctor joined the conversation. “I do not know if that would be wise-.”

 William cut him off. “It’s fine, do what he asked. He will keep asking until he finds out regardless.” The doctor escorted Ronald out of the room to talk to him about last night in private. William then took Grell’s hand in his own, rubbing circles on the back of it with his thumb. “Grell please just wake up soon. I need to … talk to you. I need to tell … you …how sorry I really am …for all I have put you through.” He pulled her hand up to kiss it gently as tears pricked at his eyes.

 ----------------

 It had been two weeks since the attack and Grell would still not wake up. No matter the amount of medicine and fluids the doctor gave her, it was not helping and her wounds had still not healed. When the doctor had removed her stitches, being as they were not to be left in the skin for more than fourteen days, the punctures had opened, causing a lot of blood loss. He therefore had to sew the area back up with clean, new sutures.

  William had spent his hours after work between Grell’s bedside and the doctor’s office. He didn't much voice his woes to the doctor, instead just listening to stories the doctor recounted from his days as a trainee. Some of which, William had actually found amusing. The doctor could easily see however, just how much William was struggling to cope with all that was happening. He had prescribed him some tablets to help improve his mood. Even though the reaper was reluctant to turn to drugs at the beginning, he decided it was worth it if it would keep him away from his addiction.

 Ronald hadn’t flew into a rage on hearing what had happened to Grell, but he also hadn’t spoken a word to William since. The full details of the way in which Grell had suffered had left the young reaper in shock. Even though he wanted to help the couple so badly, he had no idea how he was going to do so.

 At the turn of the third week, another nurse from the infirmary had knocked on William’s office door. She had come with the news that Grell had just woken up. 


	16. Throwing glasses.

 He shot up from his chair, not even bothering to thank the nurse and ported straight into the hall of the infirmary.  The doctor was waiting for him outside of Grell’s hospital room. “Mr Spears, I see you have heard the good news. I must tell you that Grell is in a fragile state of mind at this current moment. You may go and see her, but please be mindful of your words and tone. It wouldn’t do her any good to become even more stressed. It seems her wounds are now starting to heal but at a very slow pace." He opened the door for William to enter and William thanked him before stepping inside.

 As soon as his feet touched the carpet of the hospital room floor, something came hurtling towards him. He managed to dodge it and it smashed on the floor next to him. Grell had thrown her glass of water full force at him, from her sitting position on the bed. “Get out, I don’t want you here! Stay away from me!"

 William paused, then took a few steps closer to her bed. "Grell, I-"

 "I said get the hell out! I never want to see you again!"

 William's breath caught in his throat. "No ... you don't mean that. Please ... dont say such things! I ... love you so much!

 Grell went to turn and grab something else from the table to throw at him. "I said get -." William heard her inhale sharply, as she turned back to face him, hand moving to press on her stomach. Her face twisted into a pained expression, as blood started to run down her side from under her hand.

 William hurried over to her and peeled her hand away. "Grell, are you okay? I ... think you've popped your stitches."

 She tried to pull her hand away from his grip. "I said I don't ... want to ever ... see your face ... again. I hate-." Her body fell limp and William caught her just before her head hit the headboard behind. He lay her back down on the bed and rushed to get help.

\-----

The doctor had managed to stitch her bleed back up quickly but when hearing how the accident had occurred, he had told William he wouldn't be allowed to visit her until she changed her mind about wanting to speak to him. William felt hurt over what she had said but understood, he would just have to give her time and hope she would forgive him.

 He once again immersed himself in his work, taking on more collections and paperwork. He willed himself to stay strong and not give in to his addiction. If he did, he was sure Grell would forever be upset with him and would never speak to him again.

 On the third night after visiting Grell, William was alone in the kitchen, preparing his dinner when there was a knock on the door. Opening it, he saw Ronald standing there. "Hey boss ... I just came t' get some things for Grell. Tha' doctor said she ... is gettin' better and mi' be discharged by the end of tha' week."

 William adjusted his glasses and opened the door for Ronald to come inside. "I'm very relieved to hear she is improving. What items has she asked for?" Ronald shrugged his shoulders. "Just some clothes, shoes and makeup. Oh, an' a few romance novels. Tha' was it, really"

 William nodded and turned around to go upstairs. "I'll go and collect the items she has requested." William came back downstairs five minutes later, with a large bag full of Grell's favorite clothes and shoes, as well as her usual makeup.

 Ronald was standing in the living room and William walked in and handed him the bag. He then spotted a book on the living room coffee table. "Take this for her too, it was the latest novel she was reading."

 "Thanks." Ronald walked back to the door and William opened it for him. As he stepped outside, he turned back around to face William and spoke again. "Er boss, Grell ... well she said ... She said she ain't comin' back 'ere again. She said she's... movin' out. I'm... sorry."

 He ported out of view before William could even grasp the words which had just been spoken. He stood there in shock, realising Grell had meant every word she had shouted at him and with that, something inside of him tore. He was left feeling empty and broken.


	17. Council meeting.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was to try and show all points of view on what William had done. I know some readers may be wondering why the doctor isn't being horrible to him.

 The doctor gripped the letter in his hand. He was to attend a meeting with the council. The nurse who was on duty the night of the attack had reported the incident. He changed from his usual uniform to a suit and ported over to the council main entrance.

 The receptionist addressed him as he walked up to the desk. "I assume you are doctor Cole?"

 "Yes, that would be correct."

 The receptionist looked back at her schedule. "Very well. The council meeting starts in five minutes. Please enter through the door on the right, at the far end of the hallway." She gestured to the hallway to the left of him.

 He thanked her and walked down the hallway, turning to knock on the door. A member of the council opened it. "Doctor Cole, please come in and take a seat." The council member sat down and the doctor took the only empty seat left at the table.

 After a few minutes, they began. The head of the council was first to speak. "We are summoned here today, to discuss the reported attack of one Grell Sutcliff, by the hands of William T. Spears. I will now read the nurse's report. On November 5th, Grell Sutcliff was brought to the infirmary of the London branch of the reaper accociation. He was found to have been sexually assaulted and had received two stab wounds, as well as many lacerations. The nurse has also stated that she believes the situation to be one of domestic violence and sexual abuse. We would like to hear your findings and take on this incident, doctor."

 Doctor Cole adjusted his tie as he stood up. "The findings of that report are true. However, I do not think the relationship between Miss Sutcliff and Mr Spears has always been abusive."

 "Then what have you found to be the cause of these recent changes?" The head of the council asked.

 "It has come to my attention that Mr Spears has developed a drinking problem. This sort of violence has only been a recent occurrence. I'm currently treating Spears, for this addiction as well as for newly diagnosed depression."

 "That may be the case but he is still to blame for his actions." Stated a young blonde male at the table.

 The doctor nodded. "Yes, I am aware of that. There is no excuse for his behaviour. However, since the incident, he has shown deep remorse and I am quite certain something like this will never happen again."

 The head spoke again. "How can you be so sure of that?"

 The doctor let a small sigh slip from his mouth. "Because I have known Mr Spears for a long time now. Miss Sutcliff has been in our care many times, from causes ranging from demon attacks to malfunctions with a Mr Knox's death scythe. Through all of her admissions, Mr Spears has been by her side and I have never seen even an ounce of anger from him. This has also been the first incident I have seen, where he has attacked Grell Sutcliff. Though one cannot blame the alcohol entirely, I do think that it caused Mr Spears to not consider his actions. Some people become extremely and uncharacteristically violent under the affects of this depressant, it is a proven fact."

 The head though for a moment, before he spoke. "Very well. You will continue to treat Mr Spears and if he becomes aggressive towards yourself or Mr Sutcliff again, you will report it immediately to us. We will monitor the situation but will not be bringing him in before us yet. I agree with what you have told us. I have spoken with Mr Spears many times in the past and I was quite shocked to find he was the culprit of this attack. The meeting is dismissed."

 The doctor thanked the members of the council for allowing him to have input into such an important matter, before he went back to his work. He was pleased with the information he had given. Deep down he knew William was a kind man, who had just lost his way to an addictive substance. He had been angry when he saw Grell's condition but more than that he was saddened. Such a thing should have never happened to such a lovely couple.

\------

 Fives days had passed since the council meeting and the Doctor had finally discharged Grell on that morning. He had given her another week off of work, as her wounds were not yet quite healed, being mainly scabbed by now and some just thick scars. He knew that within the next few days the rest of her cuts would follow suit.

 She hadn't spoken of William since she had shouted at him and she was quieter than usual. The doctor had told her to come back to see him in five days time, to make sure she was fully healed and so he could check on her mental state.

 She was now staying with Ronald, who was trying his best to comfort and cheer up his best friend. He had brought her some more romance novels to keep her occupied until she was able to return to work.

 Ronald could tell she was unhappy, not being at her home with William but he was glad she had decided to move to safety. Keeping her from harm was the important thing right now. He would try to mend her broken heart as soon as she was ready to open up to him, about her feelings on the whole situation. He wanted to help, but he wasn't yet quite sure how.


	18. Speaking from the heart.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter trying to explain more thing about William's point of view. Plus a surprise from Grell's past just to shock you all ;)

A week later

 Tomorow was the day Grell was to return to work. She was glad for the freedom from the boredom she had been feeling but she was also nervous. She was sure she would end up running into William at some point. It was ten pm and she was currently lay on Ronald's sofa, head on his lap.

 He looked down at her. "I'm glad ya' back at work tomorow, it's been so borin' without ya'"

 She yawned before speaking. "I'm glad too, Ronnie."

 Ronald noticed the way her voice faltered while speaking. "Are you sure? Ya' sound worried, babe?"

 "Do you think I'll see Will tomorow?"

 Ronald rubbed her back soothingly, thankful for the fact that she didn't flinch when touched, unlike when she was first discharged. "I'm not sure. I won't let 'im hurt ya', don't worry."

 She turned her head to look up at him properly. "That's not what I'm scared of. I'm scared ... that when I see him ... I'll miss him so much that I won't be able to bear it."

 "Don't worry about it babe, ya' might not even see 'im tomorow" Ronald said, as he continued to rub her back.

 "I never thought he'd ever do this to me. He was ... The one to take me away from such violence in the first place."

 Ronald looked down at her, confused. "Wha' do y' mean?"

 Tears pricked at her eyes. "He saved me from such treatment, years ago ... before we got together. He helped me when I felt like I was at my ... lowest. He always told me I shouldn't let someone treat me like that. That I ... was too special. Was it all just lies?"

 Ronald ran his hand up to her hair, as she yawned again. He was shocked, never knowing of such events in her past. "I really don't kno'. I've no idea how he's feelin'. I jus' want you safe. We can try to help William lata'. Right now y' could do with sleepin'. We got a busy day tomorow."

 "Hmm." With that she fell asleep. 'Could have let me go to bed before you dozed off', Ronald thought, realising he'd have to sleep upright as to not disturb her.

\--------

 William had gone to the doctor's office late that night, unable to sleep. The doctor had given him his timetable, so William knew when he would be working. Tonight he was working the night shift.

 William had been struggling ever since Grell had moved out. He spent the days distracting himself with paperwork, only to come home and collapse in bed, unable to move under the weight of his heartache. He'd just lay there, wishing he could turn back time and undo all the awful things he'd done.

 He had started to believe himself to be a monster and therefore thought Grell would be better off without him. He didn't even know if he was fighting his addiction for her sake or his own anymore. If it was only for her, there wasn't much point in fighting the cravings anymore. Part of him however, didn't want to drag himself any deeper into his depression. There was no point in that, he had to at least try to put the shattered fragments of his life back together.

 The doctor looked up from his desk as William entered. "Ah. Mr Spears. Can you not sleep?"

 The reaper sat down tiredly in the chair across the desk from Dr Cole. "No, I cannot. I haven't for days."

 "Is it because of Miss Sutcliff’s absence from your home? Or is there something else troubling you? We have been talking for weeks now and you still haven't opened up to me about anything. How am I suppose to help you, when you have told me nothing about the source of your issues?"

 William adjusted his glasses, trying to stifle a tired yawn. "You know I am no good with words or feelings."

 The doctor smiled at him. "Well I'm just going to ask you straight then, why did you begin to drink?"

 "I do not wish-."

 "Please, William. I know it may be hard, but it's for the best. If I know the root of the issue, it'll make treatment easier."

 "I do not wish to discuss this." He paused and sighed. He was at rock bottom already. What harm would trying to explain himself do? "Very well. It was ... because of Eric slingby's death."

 The doctor frowned slightly. "That was his own undoing. He died at the hands of a demon, it wasn't your fault."

 William shook his head. "No, I should have realised what he was doing. I knew ... the soul numbers and deaths were not adding up and I did ... nothing. I was trying to deny it. I didn't want to ... believe what I knew to be the truth. It was my fault he killed 999 people. It's my fault he died."

 Dr Cole looked at him carefully. "It wasn't your fault William. He chose the path he took. It was by his own hands, that he met his death. Thank you for finally telling me."

 William left the doctor's office later that night, feeling strangely relieved. Like a weight had been lifted. Though it hurt his pride to admit such faults in his passed decisions, it felt nice for someone to finally be able to understand the source of his troubles. He hadn't even told Grell the full story. Looking back, he wished he had, instead of just mindlessly lashing out at her.

\-----

 The next day, Grell was finding work to be going quite well. The collections with Ronald had been fun and she was now heading to the break room, to meet him for a nice cup of tea.

 On the way there, she stopped dead in her tracks. William had just left the break room and was heading down the hallway towards her. When he spotted her, he froze, wide eyed. She stared at him, before words slipped from her mouth. "Will? William?"

 He turned and rushed off down the hallway, passed the break room and out of the building. His heart was pounding in his chest. He loved her as much as he ever had. Maybe he was even more in love with her now, from being apart from her for what felt like an eternity.


	19. Trip to the Undertaker.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exciting chapter to come.

Later that night.

 Ronald walked into the living room to see Grell lying on the sofa, curled into a blanket and sobbing quietly. He walked over and knelt down in front of the sofa to face her. "Grell? What's tha' matta' babe?"

 She sniffed, trying to stop the sobs, as she spoke. "I saw ... William today, before I went to meet you in the breakroom."

 "Oh, I wondered why y' was quiet afta' collections today. Wait, he didn't hurt y' did he?"

 She shook her head slightly. "No, no. He didn't. He ... ran away from me. Do you think ... he is a bad person, Ronnie?"

 "Lemme sit by y', babe." Grell sat up and moved over to the one side of the seat. He sat down next to her and she lay back down, head in his lap once more. "I don't kno' t' be honest. I always thought he was a good man, he always did treat ya' well but I'm not sure anymore. I hope he's still the same Will we 'ave always known. But I don't kno'. Time will tell, I guess."

 "I still love ... him ... so very much." She said, before sobbing again.

 Ronald stroked his fingers through her hair, it always seemed to calm her somewhat. "I know y' do babe. Do y' want t' start seeing him again?"

 "I don't know. I think ... I need to speak to Adrian ... he will know what I should do. He always knows."

 Ronald yawned, it was getting late. "Whateva' y' think is best, babe."

\-----

 The next day Grell ported over to the Undertaker's, on her dinner break. She opened the door and stepped in. The Undertaker looked up at her, from a corpse he was attending to. He walked over to the sink to wash his hands, as he spoke. "Oh, me dear rose, what a lovely surprise. Things haven't gone so well, have they, me dear?"

 She looked at him, confused for a second. "How did you know? I presume you mean with William and I?"

 He walked over to Grell and pulled her into a tight hug. "Yes. I've had an awful feeling in my stomach these past few weeks. Terrible worry over you. When I hadn't seen you collecting souls around these parts, I knew something bad had happened."

 "Oh? Well I came here to ask for your advice, Adrian.

 "Hehe. Let me guess. Me little rose wants to know whether to pursue her darling man? She wants to know if she will be hurt again?" He giggled.

 "I have no idea how you know me so well darling, but yes my heart is all a flutter over such matters" She pulled away and looked at him. "So what is a lady, such as myself, suppose to do?"

 The Undertaker smiled widely. "Follow your heart, me dear, run back to your cold prince. Just err on the side of caution. We wouldn't want any of your pretty little rose petals to be pulled off."

 He hugged her again and then she had to leave to return to work. Grell had just enough time to grab something to eat but she headed in the opposite direction to the canteen. She was going back to her cold prince just like Adrian had told her to. Only just time, she would be extra careful and wouldn't let him so close as to hurt her. Not for a while, at least.


	20. Office talks.

William had spent the day after seeing Grell, head in this paperwork but not really concentrating on it. It hurt him to remember what he had put her through. She still looked tired and pale, probably from stress, he thought. He felt like he had to keep his distance, to make sure he never hurt her again. Even though all he wanted was to hold her in his arms and never let her go, he knew he had to take responsibility for his actions and as such, decided he would never talk to her or come near her again.

 There was a knock at his door and without looking up from his paperwork, he spoke. "Yes, enter." He heard the door open and someone walking towards him.

 Before he had chance to turn around, arms slid around his neck, a head pressing into the side of it. A familiar smell of sweat perfume wafted into his nostrils. "Oh Will, my dear William."

 He could feel his neck growing wet with Grell's tears. No this couldn't be happening. He couldn't let Grell get close enough to get hurt again. "Remove yourself from me, Sutcliff."

 He felt her stiffen slightly at his even colder than usual tone but she didn't move. "What? Why?"

 William felt his heart clench, she sounded so sad. He willed himself not to just turn around and pull her into his arms. "I said remove yourself from me or I will have someone remove you from my office."

 She finally let him go and straightened up. He turned around to look at her, tears streaming down her face, eyes fulll of confusion and hurt. "Don't you love me anymore?" She choked out.

 William stood up. "This is not a matter stemming from lack of love, Sutcliff. I ... simply wish to cause you no more harm. I cannot forgive myself for what I've done. Our relationship is over. It was the moment I first lashed out at you"

 "But I love you..."

 William sighed. "Just go."

 She moved closer again, wrapping her arms around his waist and burying her head in his chest. He could feel Grell trembling against him. "I don't want to go ... William, please. I love you. I can't forgive you for what you've done to me yet but I want to at least try."

 "Sutcliff, please look at me." She did, eyes starting to shine with hope. "I do not wish to try. I ruined everything the moment I raised my hand to you."

 Her furrowed her eyebrows in annoyance. "You think I don't know that! I hate you for what you did to me and I don't trust you one bit but I have to try. My heart beats only for you, William and I miss you so much. I miss the way you used to be."

 "I miss it too but it's no use. I cannot allow myself close to you again. I cannot risk hurting you." His hands moved to his waist and he pulled her arms away from him, taking a step back from her.

 "Will, please I know you're still that sweet man I fell in love with deep inside. I don't want to let you back into my life just so you can assault me again but ... I love you. I ... can't just walk away. Please tell me, when was the last time you drank?"

 Adjusting his glasses, William spoke. "What if I'm not? Maybe I have changed. I don't even recognise the monster I have become. As for your question, I haven't touched any alcohol since I put you in the hospital."

 "See! You aren't a monster. We can work things out, just please let us atleast try. If you ever hurt me again, I'll cut you to shreds with my scythe myself but please just one last try."

 William turned and walked to sit back down. "It isn't just your decision alone. I said no, that is my final answer. I do not wish to speak to you again. The risk is too great. Now go or I'll have you removed."

 "But wi-"

 "Leave at once." He picked up his pen and returned to his paperwork. He heard loud sobs as the door was opened and the love of his life left the room.

 Grell raced to her office to try to pull herself together. It was really all over?

\------

 William finished work and rushed back to his house, before he had chance to even think of heading to the liquor store. His head hurt and his heart felt heavy. Had he really just pushed the love of his life away? When she was kind enough to give him one last chance? He knew it was probably for the best but there was a tinge of regret tugging at his conscience. He missed her so much.

 Walking into the kitchen, he spotted the bottle of tablets the doctor had prescribed him. His hand wavered, before he grabbed the bottle and downed a handful of pills. He just wanted to forget, to escape from the awful life he had created for himself.

\----

 Grell had been inconsolable that night and even with Ronald trying to comfort her, she wouldn't stop crying. "Babe, maybe it's for tha' best. He did hurt y' pretty bad, at the end of the day."

 She shook her head. "No ... I need him. I don't want to ... get hurt again but ... I love him ... so much. I just want ... things to go back to how ... they were before. He's still the man I fell for really ... I know he is. He's just not ... well right now."

 Ronald sighed. "No 'e isn't well at all, if 'e would hurt y' like that. I'll try to speak to 'im tomorow, if you want. To be honest, I wanna' know if my mate is still in there somewhere."

 "Oh Ronnie! Th ... thank you.


	21. Office lectures.

 The following day.

 William sat in his office, feeling quite ill from all the tablets he ingested the night before. He had gone to the doctor's office earlier that day, glad for the fact he was on the day shift. He'd told the doctor about what had happened, both with Grell and with the tablets, though opening up to anyone was still a difficulty.

 The doctor had told him not to let a slip back cause him to have low spirits and to just move forward and learn from what had happened. He'd also asked William about his thoughts relating to not wanting to allow himself to have another chance with Grell.

 Once William had explained, the doctor smiled at him and stated. "If she loves you enough to give you another chance after you caused her so much pain, you should be thankful for that and give it a try. I think you have realised the severity of your actions and as such, will never lay a finger on her again. If you love her as much as you proclaim, being with her will give you the support I think you need. Go to her and explain everything. Go back to the only woman you have ever loved."

 William knew he was right but he was scared. Scared he'd relapse and hurt Grell again or worse, end up killing her. A knock at his office door pulled him from his thoughts. He hoped it wasn't Grell this time. He couldn't handle that right now. "Enter."

 It wasn't Grell, it was Ronald. William looked over at him, confusion knitting his brow. "Reaper Knox, why are you here?"

 Ronald leaned against the wall. "I came 'ere to talk to y' about Grell. She's a mess, boss. She wants y' back, she needs y'."

 William rubbed his head. "Did she send you?"

"Na, I came 'ere myself. Wanted to see if y' really am the man you were before this mess or if y' really 'av changed for the worst."

 William sighed. "I haven't the time for this. I have a lot of work to complete."

 "Wrong, boss. Doesn't Grell mean tha' world to y'?"

 With another sigh, William spoke again. "Yes ... She does. However I cannot be around her. I'm afraid she will end up hurt again."

 "Na, don't worry about that. I'll kill y' myself if you lay a finga' on 'er." Ronald stood up from the wall and walked closer to William's desk.

"Pardon?"

"Listen, all I'm trying ta' say is tha' she loves you. If y' don't take this chance, ya' a moron. Ya' lucky she's willin' ta' 'av y' back. Don't hurt 'er more by pushin' 'er away."

 William's eye brow twitched slightly. "I'll pretend you didn't just call me that and yes I know I'm lucky to have someone like Grell love me. However I cannot get close to her again. The risk if too great."

 "Well I think ya' being stupid. If y' regret hurtin' her as much as u seem to, there's no chance ya' gunna' beat on her again. Just 'ave a good think about going back to 'er, that's all I'm sayin'. Y' know where to find 'er."Ronald opened the door to leave and spoke again as he walked out. "Idiot."

\----

 William spent the next few days thinking about what both Ronald and Dr Cole had said to him. He longed to be back at Grell's side but he was still scared. All this worry was giving him a constant headache.

 He walked to the breakroom on his dinner break and as he walked down the hall, he spotted the female reaper. She didn't look well at all, pale skinned and puffy eyed from continuous crying. She didn't look up as she walked out of the breakroom and down the hallway, turning her back on William before she had the chance to notice him.

 William knew right then and there what he had to do. He would at least try to mend her broken heart. He couldn't bare to ever see her looking so torn up again.

That night, after work, he headed to the florist to get a giant bouquet of red roses and went home. He put his best suit on and headed to Ronald's house. He knocked on the door and waited.

 Ronald answered and called for Grell to come over to them. She looked at William in shock, bloodshot eyes going wide. "William?"


	22. Roses.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last but one chapter which is why it's short. Added a snog for tirnel but a gentle one :)

 William extended his arm to give Grell the roses. His heart was beating fast in his chest, not knowing what her reaction would be. Not knowing if he had made the right decision in coming here tonight.

 She took the flowers from him and handed them over to Ronald, before she jumped forward and hugged him tightly. William froze for a second, before wrapping his arms around her gently and resting his chin on top of her head. Without her heels on she was quite a bit shorter than him.

 "Oh, my William has returned to me." She pulled away slightly and stretched up, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him fiercely, tongue slipping between William's lips. He pulled her closer, opening his mouth slightly, tongue sliding against hers.

 Ronald made a loud coughing voice to get their attention, before speaking. "Y' should probably come inside, looks like it's gunna' start rainin'."

 The two walked inside and Ronald locked the door, before following them and putting the roses on the living room coffee table. "I'm gunna' go get somet' ta' eat." He said and walked into the kitchen to give them some privacy.

 Grell pulled William down onto the sofa and snuggled into his side. "Will?"

 "Yes?"

 She smiled sadly at him. "I've missed you so much ... I haven't been able to sleep in days. I'm so thankful you're here."

 William moved to wrap his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "I've missed you too. Very much. I'm so sorry for everything."

 "Things will be okay from now on, won't they?" She asked, worry in her voice. 

 William kissed her head again. "Yes, I hope so. I promise to treat you the way you deserve to be treated from now on."

 She snuggled down further into his chest. "Oh, my sweet William. I love you so much."

 They stayed snuggled up on the sofa for hours, with small kisses passing between them, before they both succumbed to sleep. That night, they slept better than they both had in weeks.

\----

 William stirred from his sleep, having felt something bounce off of his head. Ronald had just thrown a ball of paper at him. "Wake up, boss or you'll be late for work."

 William grunted and looked up at him. "Hmm, what time is it, Knox?"

 Ronald grinned down at him. "Half seven." William gaped up at him. He'd have to hurry if he wanted to get to work in time. Looking down, he saw Grell asleep, with her head on his lap. He slid out from under her carefully, as to not wake her and ported to his house. He showered and got dressed quickly, before heading to work.

 Later that day, he walked to Grell's office with a cup of tea and a slice of pudding from the canteen in hand. He knocked and walked in. She looked over at him and smiled. "Oh, my darling, what have you brought for me?"

 "Rhubarb crumble. They didn't have any bread pudding. I hope you'll like it."

 She giggled. "Well haven't I always liked it, sweetie?" He walked over to her desk, placing the items on it and leaning down to give her a gentle kiss.

 Pulling away, he spoke. "I love you."

 "I love you too." After kissing her for a while longer, he left. After Grell had finished work, he planned to go over to Ronald's again and hold her in his arms all night long.


	23. Kittens.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter. Love how this story turned out. Will soon be posted a sequel and then a prequel. The prequel will go into the violence Grell suffered before her and William became an item.

The past week had gone well, William spending all night, every night so far at Ronald's. They had spent most of that time just cuddling and sharing 'I love you's' and William had taken her out for dinner the night before.

 She was happy with how things were progressing, William showing not a bit of anger towards her. However, something was still bothering her. She wanted to know what had caused this whole situation. She knew William had started drinking shortly after Eric and Alan's deaths but she didn't understand how that would have affected William or if that was even the reason for this drinking problem. She decided that tonight, she would finally ask him and just hoped he wouldn't lash out at her over it again.

 William had continued to see the doctor most days and the doctor was happy with his progress so far. His temptation to drink hadn't been as strong and he did seem to be happier and more at ease.

 That night William had gone over to Ronald's about nine. They had spent the first few hours just having general conversation and snuggling up on the sofa. William had noticed Grell didn't seem as happy tonight as she normally would have been and decided to see what the matter was.

 He cupped her chin with his fingers and looked into her eyes. "Grell, what's wrong? You seem upset tonight."

 Her eyes started to fill with tears. "It's just ... I need to ask you something but I'm ... scared of how you will react."

 William felt a pang of guilt in his chest. He didn't want her to still feel frightened of him. "I promise that you have nothing to fear. You can ask me anything."

 "Why ... did this all start? What was the reason you ... began to drink? I need ... to know, I need to be ... able to understand."

 He wiped away the tears that had begun to fall and kissed her, before he started to explain. Once he had, Grell looked at him sadly. "That wasn't your fault William, Dr Cole was right. Please don't blame yourself." She pulled him into a long tender kiss. As their kiss parted she spoke again. "Also ... I want to move back in with you."

 William felt a wave of anxiety hit him. Things had been going well but he didn't know if being back in that environment with her would make things spiral out of control again. "Grell, don't you think it's a little soon?"

 She started to cry again. "Don't you ... want me ... living with you again?"

 "Of course I do. It's just the fact that I don't want things to go downhill again. I still don't trust myself."

 She looked at him for a second, before she spoke. "Well ... I trust you enough now, to want to be back home. Please ... I miss being with you properly."

 William adjusted his glasses. "If that is truly your wish, I will not stop you. It would be nice to be with you morning, noon and night. I really do love you."

 She wiped the tears from her face and pulled him into a tight hug. "I can't wait. I love you so much too."

 -----

 A few days later, Grell had packed up the few items she had and met William outside of their home. He opened the door, moving the bag with her items inside, before he picked her up bridal style and carried her inside. He placed her down outside of the kitchen door. "I have a house warming gift for you. It's in the kitchen."

 She opened the door and squealed when she saw a tiny kitten trotting up to her. "Oh William! Thank you!"

 He wrapped his arms around her. "What do you wish to call her?"

 "I have no idea. I'll have to ponder that for a while, darling." She unwrapped his arms from around her and scooped the kitten up. "Oh, she's such a lovely little thing. I've fallen in love with her already."

 ----

 The days passed by quickly and it was soon a week since Grell had moved back in. She had finally decided on a name and had called the kitten 'crimson'.

 William had continued to treat her kindly, leaving sweet notes for her every morning and bringing her cake every afternoon. She had settled into her home again and began to trust William more everyday.

 That night, they were kissing on the end of the bed, small tender touches passing between them. William pushed her down on the bed and lay on top of her. She moaned slightly as he kissed her neck and across her collar bone.

 His hands slipped up under her skirt and she tensed up, feeling his erection pressing against her leg, through his trousers. "No ... Will ... don't, please." He looked at her with a confused expression. "I ... I'm not ready for 'that' yet ... it just brings up bad memories ...I'm sorry, please ... please don't be angry. "

 William felt his stomach drop at the mention of all the pain he had caused her. "There is no need to apologise, I completely understand. I am the one who is sorry, for everything I have put you through." He rolled off of her and she cuddled into his chest. "There is no rush, I promise. I won't do anything until you tell me that you are completely ready."

 They stayed snuggled up together for a while, before they got up to change into their bed clothes. Grell leaned her head against his chest once they were in bed. "William, I love you so much. Thank you for not breaking your promise of staying sober."

 William ran his fingers through her hair. "I promised you once, that I would protect you from the violence of this world. From now on, I will do nothing but keep you safe. I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I love you greatly and this is the start of a new beginning. A beginning of happier times."


	24. Let's rewrite an ending that fits. Instead of a Hollywood horror.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the start of the sequel. It will cover the main points and ups and downs of their relationship, over the year following the events of depths of despair. It starts a month after dod finishes.
> 
> Sequel is called. Let's rewrite an ending that fits,  
> Instead of a Hollywood horror.

A month after the ending of despair.

 "Grell, will you please pack at a faster pace, we've got to be at the hotel in an hour to book ourselves in."

 "That's just the time we can book in from, darling, it's not a deadline. Now let's see, I need to get Crimson her food, more toys and her favorite blanket. Mommy loves you, my little angel." Grell said, as she picked the kitten up and cuddled it lightly again her chest.

 "Grell, it's just a cat. Just get her food, so we can go to Ronald's to drop her off."

 Grell pouted at him. "She's not just a cat. She's my little fur ball and mommy loves her. Yes she does, mommy loves you ever so much."

 William's eye brow twitched. "If you're not ready in five minutes, I shall be leaving without you."

 "Fine! Just go then."

 William shook his head and walked behind Grell, to wrap his arms around her waist. "No. I couldn't dream of you not coming with me. Paris was your choice for our trip, after all."

 She pouted again. "Then don't say such cruel things."

 "Just hurry up."

 Half an hour later, they ported over to Ronald's. Grell had to hold back tears, as she handed Crimson over to him. "Just take good care of her, Ronald, she's ever so precious to me."

 Ronald placed the kitten on the sofa and pulled her into a hug. "Take care ya'self, Grell. I'm gunna' miss ya." As Grell and William left, Ronald turned around to look at the cat. "Damn pussy." He said. He really did dislike cats. They reminded him of that awful demon, who nearly knocked his teeth out on that sinking ship. He hoped Grell would be safe and that William wouldn't slip up. He still worried over her, everyday.

 -----

 William and Grell ported into an abandoned alleyway to prevent any humans from spotting them, before they headed to their hotel. It was right by the Eiffel Tower.

 William had managed to book some holiday for the both of them and Grell had told him how much she wanted to go to Paris. She had never been before.

 Grell looked around in awe. "Oh, Will, isn't it just beautiful here?!"

 "Not as beautiful as you." William said, moving to lace his fingers with hers. She blushed and giggled.

 They got to the hotel and booked into a lavish room. It was decorated with large mirrors and lace curtains. The bed was covered in a silk bed sheet and plush red pillows. The bathroom housed a large circular tub and red candels mounted on golden candelabras. It also had a balcony, that gave them an amazing view of the Eiffel Tower.

 Grell swooned. "Oh, it's absolutely fabulous! I love our room so much Will, thank you!" She put down her luggage bag and jumped at William, hugging him tightly.

 They got unpacked and headed out to the Lourve Museum. William was engrossed in all the finery of the art there, while Grell was giggling like a naughty school girl over the nude paintings. By the time William had managed to pull himself away from the art, it was five pm. They went home to take a bath.

 Grell still didn't trust William completely and as such, hadn't let him see her naked yet. However, she felt it was time to put more trust in him, he hadn't let her down yet after all and had treated her with nothing but kindness. "Will, come take a bath with me." She said.

 William turned around to face her. "Are you sure you're comfortable with that?"

 She averted his gaze. " I ... I'll be fine." William walked into the bathroom and ran the tap, tipping some of the rose scented bubble bath the hotel had provided into the water.

 Once the water was warm enough but not too hot, he stripped his clothes off and entered the water. Grell came into the bathroom a few minutes later, hair tied up in a bun. William turned his head away from her, so she could undress without feeling too uncomfortable.

 She stepped into the bath and sat down, leaning back between his open legs, to press her back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the bottom of her neck. "The bath smells lovely, darling, this is so romantic."

 William smiled against her neck. "Yes, it is." The feel of her soft skin and her lovely smell was starting to arose him, whether he wanted to be or not. Grell felt his erection pressing against her back and tensed up slightly.

 Once she had relaxed, she giggled. "Having a bit of trouble are we, Will?"

 He sighed. "Sorry."

 "Well you are a male after all, guess you can't help it." She wiggled against him, evoking a small groan from the man.

 "Grell, stop that. Don't arouse me any further. We have a booking at that restaurant in an hour."

 She giggled again. "Yes we do, darling. Sorry about that. I don't know how you can even afford it."

 He kissed her neck again, speaking between pecks. "You're ... worth all ... the ... money ... in the world."

 "You're such a sweetheart!"

 They dried off and got dressed, before heading to the restaurant. It was a very posh, very expensive building, lit with candles, satin cloth draped over all of the tables.

 The waiter came to the table, introducing himself in basic English. "Welcome to our restaurant. I will be waiter for you tonight. Would you like to try the wine?"

 Grell shot William a worried look, who cleared his throat. "No ... no, thank you. I'll just have some water, if I may." Grell felt relief wash over her.

 "Sure, sir. Which food?"

 Grell ordered a fish dish and William a beef one. They ate slowly, enjoying each other's company, before heading back to the hotel. When they got back, they went onto the balcony and cuddled, while watching the light's of Paris.

 Grell started to feel completely at ease in William's company and pulled him into the bedroom, pushing him onto the bed and lying on top of him. She kissed him fiercely, grinding her hips down onto his. William let his hands trail up her top, running his fingers against her soft skin.

 Grell started to feel uncomfortably again, realising she still wasn't actually ready for intimacy. She rolled off of him at that point and cuddled into his side. "Paris is so lovely."

 "It really is but it wouldn't be without you here." They got up to change into their bed clothes, before they snuggled up in bed, both falling to sleep within minutes.


	25. Sequel chap 2. Intimacy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was such a hard chapter to write. Plus my insomnia has been awful. As such I haven't updated all day. 
> 
> Tried my best to show Grell's feelings. Let me know if anything needs adding.
> 
> I hope you realise I didn't post this for the sex, but more to show how their relationship is progressing. That's why there's barely any description of the actual act. It's not the point of the chapter. Hope this is received well.

 They had been in Paris for three days now and Grell had loved every minute of it. They had been to the Notre Dame Cathedral the second day of their trip and she had laughed so hard at William, whose mouth was hanging open in amazement at the beautiful architecture.

 They had then gone to a cafe' and Grell had gorged herself on croissants, which had left her feeling sick. William had scooped her up in his arms and carried her back to the hotel. He'd run a bath for the two of them and washed her hair and body.

 Once the sick feeling had passed, he'd placed her on the bed and crawled on top of her, kissing her gently. She'd felt butterflies in her stomach, a knotting feeling of need to be intimate with him.

 She'd ground her hips up against his, arousing him instantly. He'd kissed her neck and unbuttoned the first few bottoms of her shirt, sliding down to kiss her chest. A few moans had escaped her, before he'd taken her nipple into his mouth. She'd whimpered slightly and he had instantly jumped off her and apologised.

 She'd pulled him back onto the bed for a long cuddle, telling him she wasn't mad. That she wanted to do such things with him but part of her just wasn't ready yet. He'd hugged her tighter and told her there was no rush. No rush at all.

 The need to be close to him had only intensified the next day when they had taken a visit to the Eiffel Tower. They were standing on the top floor, looking out at the city below. He'd come up behind her and placed kisses to her neck and behind her ear. As he kissed a very tender spot at the join of her ear, she'd felt her pants grow tighter. She'd wanted him so badly right then. Just to have him make love to her.

 She'd dragged him back to the hotel room and shoved him up the wall, kissing him fiercely. He'd just kissed her back softly, wrapping his arms around her waist, lips moving from her mouth to across her cheek and down onto her neck.

 She'd dragged him on top of her on the bed, pulling at his top. He'd stopped her and told her to slow down, before pushing her top up and sliding down to kiss her chest. He'd looked up into her eyes and told her to just let him know when she wanted him to stop. He'd kissed all over her stomach and chest, stroking up her sides soothingly.

 It wasn't until he'd started kissing along the band of her skirt, pulling the material down slightly, that awful memories entered her mind and she'd told him to stop for today. He had at once and asked her where she wanted to visit next that day.

 They had gone shopping and Grell's mind was whirling. She wanted nothing more than to be as close to him as possible, like they used to be. She missed the passionate moments when she'd sneak into his office and get pushed down onto the desk. She missed the sweaty nights of nothing but love making. She also longed for the tender kisses and soft touches he would always give her, before everything had fallen apart.

 Still, she was apprehensive, worried about being hurt again. She'd eventually pushed that worry from her mind sharply. Tonight she was going to put her full trust in him, hoping he wouldn't let her down. Hoping she'd be able to cope with doing such things.

 She'd told him to go and get her some more baked goods, before rushing off to a lingerie store to find a night dress that would surely make William's mouth drop open in awe.

 ----

 That night, she stood in the bathroom, with the door locked. She slid her clothes and pants off and slipped on her night dress. It was a strappy red outfit, with fake fur sewn around the edge of it. It was silky to the touch and cut her mid thigh.

 She was just finishing her make up, when William knocked the door. "Grell? Are you okay, you've been in there a while?"

 "Yes ... yes, William, I'm fine darling. I'll be out in a minute."

 William paused for a second, hearing the way her voice shook with what seemed like nerves. "Are you sure? You sound upset?"

 "No, no ... I'm fine. I'm just getting ready for ... bed. I'll be out in a minute."

 "Okay, if you're sure." She heard William's footsteps move from the door and she sighed, resting her head against the bathroom mirror.

 She wanted this more than anything, just to feel closer to the man she loved again. She wanted to show him just how much her trust in him had grown but there was this little nagging thought inside of her head. That if she truly let him close to her, he would just hurt her again. Flashes of the past assaults flashed through her mind but she shook them away.

 She was getting angry at herself, on one hand her raging hormones and love for William being intensified by the romance of the city. On the other, being scared to death of what might happen. She wished she could just be her old fiesty self, who didn't let anything phase her. Had the trauma really turned her into someone who was constantly scared? Had she really lost her fighting spirit?

 'God dammit Grell, get a grip. He's not like that anymore. He won't hurt you.' She thought, as she took a shaky breath and straightened up. Taking one last look in the mirror, she unlocked the door and slipped outside.

 "I thought you'd fallen down the-" William's words caught in his throat as he looked up to see Grell, long legs showing from under a clingy red outfit. She walked over to the bed and pushed him against the covers, moving onto the bed herself. She quickly pulled his boxers down and pressed her lips hard against his.

 Her hand slipped down to stroke him roughly and he pulled her hand away. "Grell, stop. You ... don't have to do this. I've told you ... there's no rush."

 Her lips moved to suck on his neck, words muffled against his skin. "No ... Will ... I ... I want this ... I want you."

 William sighed. "Grell. You're shaking like a leaf. Please don't put yourself through this stress. I've told you, take as long as you need."

 She pressed her face into his neck, tears slipping from her eyes. "No I want this. I ... I'm sick of feeling scared. I just want to feel close to you again ...Please."

 "I will, if that's what you wish but stop rushing. You're going to make yourself even more nervous if you do. Just try to relax."

 She nodded against his neck and he rolled them over, moving his weight onto his elbows, as his chest rested lightly against hers. He kissed her softly, before lacing his tongue with hers. "You look absolutely beautiful in this." He whispered, as their kiss parted and he then trailed kisses down her neck.

 Small moans slipped from her as her shakes stilled. He spent the next hour just kissing her and sucking lightly on her neck, before he slid her night dress up and moved to between her legs, pecking kisses all over her chest and stomach before he finally pulled her outfit over her head."So beautiful." He said, between kisses across her hip bones.

 He moved his hand up her thigh and rubbed between her legs. She whimpered slightly but then relaxed again. As he began to stroke, her hands moved down and gripped his shoulders, heads pressing back into the pillow.

 He released his grip on her and moved up to grab the pillow she wasn't lying on. Moving back down, his lifted her hips and placed them on top of the pillow. He licked his fingers and rubbed her entrance.

 Feeling her stiffen against his touch, he slid back up to kiss her lips. Waiting until she relaxed again, her hands gripping the bed slightly, he slid his first finger in. Her whole body clenched up, as a yelp left her mouth.

 He pulled away from the kiss. "It's okay my angel. Just try to relax, I'm not going to hurt you, I promise." She nodded but her eyes had begun to shine with tears. He kissed down her neck and began to slide his finger in and out of her.

 Once the muscles around his finger felt more relaxed, he added a second. She cried out in pain, hands gripping the bed at the side of her.

 He pulled out and looked at her, guilt washing over him. "Grell. Let's just go to sleep, it think it would be wise to leave this for tonight."

 "Don't ... don't you want me?" She began to cry.

 He sighed. "Of course I do. I just don't want you in pain. I love you from the bottom of my heart."

 "No ... Please carry on. I want to ... stop being scared. Please Will ... I just want things back to the way ... they used to be."

 "Are you sure?" He asked. She nodded. You know there's no pressure from me to do anything?"

 She spoke quietly. "I know that. I'm the one ... who wants this."

 He moved from the bed. "Okay. If that's what you wish but please just try to relax. I'll be as gentle as possible, you have nothing to fear. Lie on your side instead, it'll probably soothe you a bit if I can hold you."

 She did as he asked and he lay behind her, spooning up to her and sliding a finger back in. Met with less resistance, he added a second and then a third, sliding down to kiss her shoulder as he prepared her gently.

 He pulled his fingers out and lubed himself up. Lining himself up to her entrance, he wrapped his arm around her and held her hand, before he pressed into her.

 She gripped his hand tightly, her muscles clenching against the intrusion. He waited for her to adjust before moving slowly.

 A few pained sounds left her mouth, before they were replaced by small moans. He picked up speed, holding her hand tightly and telling her how much he loved her, to keep her calm. After a while her moans grew louder and she begged him to go harder.

 It felt good and she felt the fear start to leave her, William moving his hand to stroke her. She began to enjoy it more and moaned his name shrilly, as she came into his hand.

 That was until she heard his grunts of pleasure and felt liquid seep inside her. Memories and flashbacks whirled around her mind and she started to cry. As he pulled out she sobbed loudly, body beginning to tremble uncontrollably.

Noticing her distress, William spoke. "Grell? What's the matter? Did I do something wrong?"


	26. Sequel chap 3. Silence.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start to slip again.

 William's heart was full of sorrow and confusion. He didn't know what he had done wrong. He'd complied with Grell's wishes. He'd been as gentle and loving as he could possibly have been.

 The previous night had been awful. Once Grell had started to cry, she hadn't stopped all night. William had tried to comfort her and hug her but everytime she had pushed him off or slapped his hands away. She hadn't spoken a word to him and wouldn't tell him why she was crying, no matter how many times William had asked.

 William felt nothing short of wretched. He didn't know what the matter was. Had he hurt her? Had he said something wrong? He didn't have any idea, as Grell wouldn't give him so much as a clue. He felt one thing for sure though, this current situation was all his fault.

 That morning, they had packed their bags in silence and booked out of their hotel. The hotel receptionist had given them a concerned look, once she had noticed the tears still sliding down Grell's face.

 Once they got back home, Grell put her bag on the floor and went to lie down on the sofa. She curled up and started to sob. William bent down in front of the sofa and reached his hand out to her. She slapped it away, rolling over to face away from him.

 "Grell, please just talk to me. I do not understand what I have done to upset you. I thought ... you wanted to be intimate last night?" Her sobs grew louder and William sighed. He decided to give her some space and try to talk to her again later that day.

 He spent the rest of the day washing their dirty clothes from the trip and reading the newspaper. He went upstairs and lay down, trying to block out the noise of her cries coming from downstairs. His mind wandered back to temptation. The guilt he was feeling was crushing him and he didn't know how he was going to handle it sober.

 He decided to go for a long walk, around the local park, to try to clear his head but his efforts were in vain. Around six pm he took a trip down to the nearby shop to buy Grell some cake and to stock up on basic groceries.

 When he got back home, he made them both a cup of tea and took Grell her tea and cake. She was sitting on the sofa, kneels curled into her chest, arms wrapped around them.

 William sat down on the other end of sofa and spoke. "Grell, what's wrong? Please talk to me. There's nothing to be afraid of, I promise. Just tell me what I've done wrong." She once again refused to answer him.

 He rested his head in his hands, feeling tears start to prick at his eyes. "Just ... please tell me ... how to fix this." He received no reply. "Grell, please ... I love you." There was a long silence and William started to get annoyed. How was he suppose to put things right when he didn't understand what was wrong?

 He stood up, needing to get out of the house, sorrow grating away at him, as he darted out of the door and down the street. Slowing down, he walked past the liquor store and stopped, turning to stare back at the building that housed his addiction. His breath shook, as he let the temptation grind away his resolve.

 He entered the store and considered the whiskey in front of him, the bitter liquid that would soothe his inner turmoil. He picked it up, before placing it back on the shelf. No, he thought, he couldn't allow himself to slip up. He couldn't risk turning violent once more. If he did, he would surely hurt her again. 'Maybe I already have', he thought sadly.

 He reentered his house and went straight to the bedroom, before the sight of Grell sobbing could wreck more havoc on his conscience. He wanted to escape so badly, from all his worries. That's when he spotted the bottle of prescription drugs on the bedside table, which he had placed there earlier, after unpacking. Maybe if he took some, he would get some sleep. He would find his escape.

 Walking downstairs, he got a glass of water and then returned to the bedroom. Within a few minutes, the whole bottle of pills had been swallowed. He sat on the edge of the bed for a while, empty bottle in hand, before the tablets took affect. Dizziness hit him and he fell forward onto the floor. He fell into unconsciousness, his worries slipping from his mind.

 -----

 Grell had spent the whole night on the sofa, unable to sleep. Awful images of the assaults whirled around in her mind until the early hours of the morning. She felt horrible. William hadn't done anything wrong on their last night in Paris. It was her own inner demons and woes which had upset her. She was angry at herself for being so weak, for letting the past haunt her. Still, she had continued to push William away since then, unwilling to talk to him. Unwilling to open up about what was really going on.

 As seven o'clock rolled around, she realised William hadn't yet come downstairs to have breakfast, before he had to head to work. She would have to go to see if he was okay and try to speak to him, without breaking down into tears again.

 She pushed the door to the bedroom open and shrieked when she say William lying on the floor, empty medicine bottle to the side of him. She rushed over to him, beginning to panic. "William!" She sunk down to her knees at his side, shaking him. "William, please wake up ... Please ... I'm so sorry ... Please wake up." Her panic only grew as her efforts to stir him failed. "Please! Just wake up!"


	27. Sequel chap 4. Pills.

 Grell ported herself and William to the infirmary, heart beating hard in her chest. She prayed William would be okay. She had his arm draped over her shoulder, keeping him propped up. Her legs were starting to shake with nerves and she hoped they wouldn't buckle from under her. They were both still in their clothes from yesterday and Grell's hair stuck out messily in all directions.

 Dr Cole rushed up to them. "What has happened?"

 Tears leaked down her face. "He ... overdosed on ... the tablets you gave him ... all of them. The ... bottle was ...empty. I found him unconscious this morning. Please help him."

 The doctor guided her into a room and she placed William on the bed. "Mr Spears will be fine. Those tablets are based on human medicine. They are not potent enough to cause harm to a reaper. They will just make him sleep for a while."

 Grell breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness. I was so worried."

 The doctor looked at her carefully. "Do you know the reason why he took them? Is everything well at home?"

 She shook her head. "No ... things have been a bit strained ... the past few days. It's my fault ... I've been a bit distant with him."

 The doctor placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Would you like to talk about it?" She shook her head again. "Very well, he should be awake in a few hours. Judging by the fact that the bottle was empty and that I had just renewed his two month prescription last week, I'd say that he took about fifty tablets. As such, he will probably be a bit groggy when he does wake up. You can stay with him until then. Please call me in, if you need anything."

 She smiled sadly at him. "Thank you, Dr Cole." As he left the room, she turned to look down at William and whispered. "Oh Will, what were you thinking?"

 -----

 Grell had spent the next few hours at William's bedside, holding his hand. "Hn, what ... where am I?" William opened his eyes slowly. "What ... happened?"

 Grell jumped on him and laid her head on his chest. "Oh, my darling, I was so worried! You took ... so many pills. I'm so glad you're alright."

 William wrapped his arms around her. "I'm sorry, Grell, I didn't mean ... to frighten you."

 "I'm just glad you're okay. Why did you do it, Will? Was it ... because of me?"

 There was silence for a while, before he spoke. "Yes ... I couldn't stand knowing I'd done something to upset you. I couldn't bear to see you so sad"

 Grell snuggled against him more. "It wasn't your fault, William. Past memories ... well they just scared me, that's all. You did nothing wrong. I love you."

 He rubbed her back soothingly. "I love you too, so much." He said, before he yawned. "I'm still ... rather tired."

 "Then rest some more, my sweet William. I'm sure you'll have a lot of work to do when you get back to your office. For the first time, you may have actually fallen behind with your paperwork." She said, with a giggle.

 William's eyes slipped shut again and Grell stayed pressed against his chest, his warmth comforting her somewhat. The more she thought about today's events, the more she worried about William. About his current mindset and about him possibly relapsing. 

 -----

 Knox had woken up around nine 'am' that morning and had waited for Grell to come to collect Crimson before work. He'd grown quite fond of the kitten over the past few days. She was more affectionate than most of her kind and actually seemed to enjoy being in a human's company. She'd spent most of her time while there asleep on Ronald's lap.

 Ronald grew worried, as the time to go to work grew nearer. Grell would have come to get Crimson, no matter what. He couldn't shake the awful dread he was feeling, as he began to wonder if she was safe. If anything had happened to her, during the trip with William.

 As midday approached, he decided to go into work as normal and see if she was around. He walked to her office, to see if she was there. When he saw that the room was empty, his stomach churned. Something had to be wrong.

 He decided to go to the infirmary, hoping she wasn't there, hoping nothing awful had happened to her. As he walked into the entrance hall, he spotted doctor Cole and approached him quickly. "Is Grell here?"

 "Yes she is, Mr Knox." He noticed the look of horror that swept across his face and continued. "She is quite alright, there is nothing to be alarmed about. Would you like me to tell her you are here?"

 Ronald nodded and doctor Cole went to tell Grell he was waiting in the hall, to speak to her. A few moments later, Grell walked down the hall. Ronald ran up to her and pulled her into a tight hug. "Is everythin' alright, babe? William didn't hurt y', did he?"

 "No ... I'm fine. It's William."

 He pulled away, to look at her, confused. "Wha' happened? Is he gunna' be okay?"

 Her eyes shone with tears. "He will be. He ... erm .... well ... he overdosed last night."

 Ronald looked at her in shock. "Wha'?! Why?"

She stared down at the floor. "I've been pushing him away. I got scared ... I worried he'd hurt me again. It's silly really ... he's done nothing over the past month to make .... me think such an awful thing. It's all my fault."

Ronald pulled her back into a hug. "Na it's not, babe, I'm sure everythin' will work out. Don't worry."

 She began to sob into his chest. "I'm scared, Ronnie. I'm scared ... he'll slip back into old ... habits. I'm so scared."


	28. Sequel chapter 5.  Discharged from worries.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another frigging hard chapter to write

 William had been discharged later that day but had spent most of it asleep in bed. He had woken up late that evening to the sweet smell of pastry. When he went down to the kitchen, he saw that Grell had baked them both apple pie.

 Grell had seemed troubled and hadn't spoken much, as they had tucked into their slices of pie. William had thought it may just be due to tiredness and decided if she still seemed that way tomorow, he would enquire into why she was seeming low in spirits.

 She had still been asleep when he had woken up for work the next day, so he left her a note in the kitchen and headed to the reaper accociation. The day had gone smoothly thus far and he had been able to catch up with most of his paperwork. It was now one o'clock and William was sat eating in the canteen on his dinner break.

\------

 When he returned to his office about two pm, he saw Ronald sitting on his desk. "Reaper Knox, what are you doing in my office? Don't you have work to do?"

 Ronald stood up. "I came 'ere to talk t' y'. Grell's been upset for tha' past two hours. She's worried about y', boss. She's worried y' gunna' start drinkin' again."

 William looked at him, confused for a moment. "What reason does she have for thinking that?"

 " 'Cause of y' landing ya'self in tha' hospital. She thinks it's tha' start of you slipping again. Y' not gunna' start drinking again, are y'?

 William adjusted his glasses. "No of course not, I shall speak to her tonight. Now get back to work, before you end up even further behind with your paperwork."

 Ronald shrugged his shoulders and walked to the door. Turning back to face William, he spoke again. "Well i hope ya' right 'bout that. She really does love y'. I don't want to see 'er hurt again." With that he left, leaving William to ponder on what he was going to say to Grell that evening.

\-----

 William was sat in the living room, waiting for Grell to return home. He heard the door open and a few moments later, Grell appeared in the living room. Her eyes were puffy from previous tears and when William noticed, his heart twisted in sadness and regret.

 He stood up and walked over to her, hugging her gently. "Grell, Ronald told me you have been upset today over my admission to hospital. I'm so sorry for causing you distress."

 She began to cry into his chest. "I'm ... scared you'll start drinking again. That the overdose ... was just the start of ... of a relapse."

 "No. No. Of course it wasn't, I was just feeling down and needed to sleep. I'd never drink again. I wouldn't risk hurting you ever again."

 "Are ... you sure?"

 William lifted her head and kissed her sweetly. Pulling away, he spoke again. "I'm positive. I wouldn't do that to you and I regret my actions from two nights ago. I promise you I won't overdose anymore either."

 She nodded and cuddled tighter into his chest. After a few minutes she had stopped crying and William lead her to the sofa for a snuggle. She looked up at him. "Will?"

"Hmm?"

 "I ... I'm sorry too ...For pushing you away. I know that .... I can trust you when you're not drunk, I shouldn't have reacted so badly to what ... happened that night on our trip."

 William shook his head. "Like I have said before, take as long as you need. Maybe in Paris, you were just not ready for such things but you do not have to apologise."

 Grell smiled for a moment, before she spoke again. "Well, maybe we can try again right now?"

 William gave her a puzzled look. "Are you sure? You don't have to put pressure on yourself to do anything"

 She climbed on his lap, smile turning to a naughty smirk. "Positive, darling. Can't succeed unless you try and it's rude to not give a lady what she wants."

 William didn't have to be told twice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will jump forward two months.


	29. Sequel chap 6. And as we rise, we begin to fall.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quite happy with this chapter. Didn't struggle to write it at all. If anyone would like anything added, let me know. As for Luke Tate, if you look on my first chapter of hybrid there's a picture explaining which reaper this is.

It had been a little over two months since the incident with William overdosing and Grell couldn't have been happier with how things were progressing. She felt them growing closer as a couple everyday. They had been out to restaurants or the theatre most nights and had spent a great deal of time in each other's company.

 William was still on his anti depressants but seemed to be getting better and was much more at ease. He'd been to the doctor a few times but just for checkups. Grell was so happy, she wasn't even worried for the future anymore, she was just content with living each wonderful day as it came.

 Crimson had grown so much during the past few months and Grell felt like her house was now a home, with a complete family. She saw Crimson as her child and loved her very much. The only thing that could surpass her love for the kitten, was her love for William.

 She had spent her time, when she wasn't at work, either cuddled in William's embrace or at Ronald's. Ronald had found a new partner and his choice had surprised Grell at first. She knew he liked both males and females but he hadn't been in a relationship with a male for a while. Still, she was happy with his decision.

 He had told her the one day, while they were in the break room eating bread pudding, that he had begun seeing Luke Tate. She had always seen him as a very sweet boy and was glad Ronald had found someone who had made him happy.

 Unlike his previous girlfriend, Luke had no issue with Ronald being so close to Grell. He also had no issue, when he had come over to Ronald's home to find Grell asleep with her head on his lap. He seemed just as laid back as Ronald and wasn't clingy in the slightest.

 Grell and William's love life was also back on track, being just as firey and passionate as it used to be. The first few times they were intimate had ended in tears, memories still upsetting Grell. William had just held her tight and comforted her the best he could.

 After a week or so, Grell had come to terms with what had happened and began to move on. It hadn't taken her long to start sneaking into William's office for quick love making sessions, like she had all the time before William had began to drink. She had almost forgotten how high both of their sex drives really were. In fact, she had been quite shocked at just how high this seeming stoic man's libido was, when they had first become an item.

 That's where she found herself currently, bent over William's desk, moaning against his touch. Once they had finished, she was straightening out her clothes, when William spoke. "I'm afraid tomorow, you will not be able to come in here."

 She turned around to look at him. "Oh? Are you growing tired of me, William?"

 He shook his head at her and smiled. "Don't think such foolish things. I have been informed I will have to partake in field duties tomorow, so I won't be in my office all day"

 Grell pouted. "How bothersome. Are we really that short staffed?"

 William walked up close to her and hugged her tightly. "It would seem so. It's also due to this being a very large assigment. I have yet to be informed of the details, but there will be over 500 souls to collect."

 "And I'm missing out on all the fun? Well, if that's the case, we will just have to make up for the loss of an opportunity right now."

 William let her go and sat down at his desk. "I do not have the time, we both have a lot of work to do today."

 "Then we'll just have to be quick, won't we, my darling?" She said, with a smirk.

 William turned around to face her and adjusted his glasses. "Very well. Five minutes, Sutcliff."

 She rushed over to him and pulled him up from the chair, shoving him against the nearest wall. "Five minutes it is."

 ------

 That night Grell had gone over to Ronald's. Luke wasn't there tonight, as he never did come over that often. He didn't feel the need to constantly be around Ronald, just because they were in a relationship.

 They were sat playing cards, when Ronald spoke. "So, how's everythin' going babe?"

 "It's going swimmingly, my dear Ronnie. I couldn't be happier."

 Ronald placed his next card down on the table. "I'm glad t' hear it. It's great y' an' William are happy. Oh by the way, looks like I win again!"

 Grell glared at him. "That's not fair! Can't you go easy on a lady for once?" She then looked at the clock. "It's getting late Ronnie, I really should be going."

 A few minutes later, after saying goodbye to Ronald, she ported back to her home. William was already fast asleep in bed and she got undressed, before sliding under the covers. 'Oh, William. I love you so much. You make me so happy.' She thought, as she fell into slumber herself.

 ----

 She woke up early the next morning, to wish William good luck with his collections before he went to work. She then had breakfast and played with Crimson, until it was time for her to get ready to head out to branch.

 Her day had gone smoothly and she was up to date with all her paperwork. Having not another collection for an hour or so, she decided to pay the Undertaker a visit.

 As she walked into the funeral home, the Undertaker greeter her. "Me dear rose, what a lovely surprise, have you been well?"

 "Very well, thank you Adrian." She was pulled into a tight hug and hugged him back with equal force.

 "I'm glad to hear it. So chilly Willy has been behaving himself?"

 She giggled. "Yes he has. He's been nothing short of charming." She spent a while at the Undertaker's, chatting over a cup of tea, before she had to leave for her next assigment.

 The collections had gone without a hitch and before she knew it, her shift had ended. When she got home, she went into the kitchen to feed Crimson.

 As she was about to put the used tin of cat food in the bin, her heart sunk. There was an empty bottle of whiskey staring back at her. She felt her happiness shatter, this couldn't be happening.

 'No William. Please no, not again." She thought, as she took a shaky breath and walked to the door of the living room. She pushed it open slowly, knowing what was waiting for her. Knowing that her world was about to come crashing down around her.


	30. Sequel chap 7. Blood splats.

 Grell gulped, as she took a shaky step inside of the room. Maybe William wasn't even in here? Maybe he was in the bedroom? If that were the case, she didn't think she could muster up enough courage to go upstairs, not after what had happened to her last time.

 Looking around, she spotted William sitting on the sofa, chin resting on top of his thumbs. She moved closer and gasped. His shirt was stained with large flecks of blood, blood that wasn't his own.

Walking tentatively forward, she stood to the side of him. He looked up at her, no anger evident on his face. No expression at all. "Will ... have you ... been drinking?"

 He lowered his hands and shook his head. "Then why is there a empty bottle of whiskey in the bin? Are you trying to scare me half to death?!"

 William sighed softly. "I poured it down the sink ... I couldn't ... drink it. I wanted to ... but .. no."

 She sat down next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Why? What's wrong? Why are you all covered in blood?"

 William looked down at the floor. "It's not important. I do not wish to discuss it."

 Grell moved her hand and gripped his collar harshly, pulling him forward and glaring at him. "Don't even think about it. Don't even think about bottling your feelings up again! We'll just end up in the same awful mess again if you do."

 "Grell, I-"

 "No, William. You have to tell me, now! Don't worry me like this. Haven't you learnt by now that you can tell me anything?"

 "Very ... well." Grell released her grip slightly. "It ... was the assigment today. We ... were attacked by demons. About twenty of them. They killed Thomas. I tried to save him but I was too slow. He died, as ... I was about to take him ... to the infirmary. It's all my fault ... just like with Eric."

 Grell raised her hand to stroke his cheek softly. "Oh, William, no, it wasn't your fault."

 "Yes it was! Everyone always dies ... because of me. I must have frightened the sales assistant ... half to death, buying the whiskey ... looking like this"

 She felt tears start to prick at her eyes, seeing her love in such misery. "And how many other reapers did you save? Against twenty demons, you were lucky to escape alive. I'm just so glad you're safe." She lay on the sofa, pulling William down to rest his head against her chest. "Please don't blame yourself."

 William pressed his face against her chest, gripping her shirt tightly, as he let his emotions show. Tears slipped from his eyes and he began to sob quietly.

 Grell sat there for the next two hours, stroking his hair and telling him over and over again how it wasn't his fault. Eventually, William stopped crying and let his exhaustion take over, falling asleep in Grell's arm.

 'I just want you to be happy.' She thought, before falling asleep aswell.


	31. Sequel chap 8. A year since passed.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is the end of the sequel. Be ready with a box of tissues.

A year from the end of the depths of despair.

Grell felt nothing but contentment . William had been down for a while after Thomas's death but with enough time and by talking to the doctor about the situation, he mad moved on. Grell had noticed a change in him, he did seem genuinely happy and as the months had passed, they had grown even closer.

 There had only been one time where Grell had been worried for their relationship, when they had gotten into an argument. It had been over something quite silly, Grell thought, looking back on the situation.

 She had been bugging William for over a week, to accompany her to a party Ronald was hosting for Luke's birthday. She had asked him if he was just fed up of being around her.

 He'd shot her an annoyed look, before shouting at her. He'd had said he didn't want to go to a party filled with nothing but beer bottles and shots of vodka. That he wasn't ready to face such temptation.

 He'd then stormed upstairs, leaving Grell to sit down with her head in her hands, feeling awful about not realising the obvious reason to begin with.

 William had come downstairs again a few hours later and they had both apologised, before Grell had dragged him back to the bedroom for rough and fiery make up sex.

\------

 It had now been just over a year since they had gotten back together and fast approaching was the five year mark since they had first started dating.

 Grell headed to Ronald's office, to ask for advice on what she and William should do to celebrate such an important  anniversary. As she opened the door, she started to giggle manically at the sight before her. Ronald was bent over his desk, Luke pounding into him from behind.

 He looked up, wide eyed, blush crossing his face. "Grell ... er ...we-."

 Grell just smiled at them evilly. "Oh no, don't let me interrupt you, Ronnie. I just came to ask you to come to the break room for a little chat. When you're all finished up here, meet me there." She turned to leave. "Oh, and take an example from me and Will, make sure to lock the door "

 Ten minutes later, she and Ronald sat down to eat apple crumble, an embarrassed flush still present on his cheeks. "So babe, wha' did y' wanna' chat 'bout?"

 She smiled up at him. "Well, it's mine and Will's five year anniversary in a few days. I was looking for advice on how to celebrate."

 "I'm sure th' boss 'as already got somethin' planned, don't worry."

 She took a bit of her dessert, before speaking again. "I have something in mind, that I can only hope will happen."

"Oh?"

 "I wish he would propose to me. That would be ever so romantic! I'd definitely accept, he's been nothing but amazing for the past year. I love him so much."

 Ronald grinned at her. "Well if ya' sure he's a changed man, that's great babe. I hope he will too!"

 "How about you and Luke, are things going well?"

 Ronald's blush grew once more. "I ... I'm in love with him."

 "Oh, darling! That's so sweet. I'm sure he loves you too."

 ----

 The rest of the work day had gone well and Grell had just returned home. She looked at Crimson worriedly and then turned to face William. "Will, I think there is something wrong with my darling cat, she's been ever so lethargic the past few days."

 William adjusted his glasses. "Maybe she's pregnant."

 Grell glared at him. "Do not imply my angel is a slut!" She snapped. "She's a house cat after all, I wouldn't let those filthy toms touch my girl. I'm really concerned about her."

 "Then if she isn't any better in a few days, we will have her looked at. Now come for a bath, it will help you relax."

 -----

 William had headed to work the next morning. Crimson had been fast asleep in her basket, so he assumed she was fine after all.

 He too was well aware that tomorow was their anniversary and had booked the day off for the both of them. He had already brought Grell a present for such an occasion and was hoping she would be pleased. It was a ruby encrusted engagement ring and he was planning to ask her for her hand in marriage, once they had been to a posh restaurant he had reserved for them.

 He was more excited than he was willing to let on, he loved his partner with all his heart and wanted nothing more than to marry her.

 He was well ahead of all his paperwork and as his shift neared the end, Ronald barged into his office. "Where's Grell!? God dammit boss, 'ave y' done somethin' to 'er?"

 William eyed him, confused. "No, if I had of done something, I wouldn't be sitting calmly at my desk. What is the reason for your concern?"

 "She hasn't been at work all day. I thought she might be out on duty but I checked tha' ledger in 'er office and none of today's collections 'ave been completed. I'm worried about 'er. She never skips work."

 William felt his stomach knot in worry. "My shift is almost over, I will go home immediately and check on her. If anything has happened, I will contact you. Now get back to your work."

 He left to go home swiftly, panic starting to set in. He entered the house and went to the living room. She wasn't there. He then walked into the kitchen and the sight that greeted him made his heart sink. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.


	32. Sequel chap 9. The ending of the story.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Right guys I want you go comment what you think has happened in the kitchen, before you read. Want to see if you are good at guessing. 
> 
> Final chapter. Made me cry writing it.

 Grell was pressed against the kitchen wall, Crimson's basket in her lap, hand bleeding badly. A shattered glass was lying on the ground to her side. Hair covered her face, tears running down from under it. Soft, heart wrenching sobs filled the room.

 William raced over to Grell and sunk down on his knees in front of her. He saw Crimson lying lifeless in her basket. "Grell ... my angel, what ... what has happened?"

 She looked up at him, hair falling back to reveal puffy eyes and a pained expression. "I don't know ... I came downstairs ... this morning before work ... and she ... Will, it's just too awful."

William took the basket from her lap and she cried out. "No ... don't ... don't take her away from me!"

 He moved closer to her and cupped his hands at each side of her cheeks, looking into her eyes. His heart was breaking seeing her so distraut. "It'll be okay Grell, I promise. Right now, I need to treat your hand. What happened to it?"

 "I don't know ... I had it in my hand ... when I came downstairs. It's just ... She can't be gone."

 William pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly, as she continued to cry. They stayed holding onto each other on the floor for a long time, before William pulled her over to the kitchen table.

 He sat her down and went to get a towel. Wetting it, he cleaned off her hand to reveal a small but deep cut. "This should be healed in no time." He said, placing a large plaster to the skin of her palm. "We ... should go lay her to rest."

 Grell broke down into hysterics, head in her hands. "No ... she can't be gone. She can't be!"

 Once she had calmed down somewhat, they went into the garden and William dug her a small grave. It was already dark and the harsh February wind blew harshly. He placed Crimson in to the hole and covered it back over with dirt. "Would you like to say a few words?"

 Grell nodded and moved close to the grave. "Mommy will always love you so much ... my darling. I'll never forget you. You meant the world to me." Her legs buckled under her sorrows and she hit the ground with a loud crack.

 William knelt down next to her, holding her hand. "You're freezing. Let's go inside and I'll run us a bath." She nodded weakly and William scooped her up and carried her inside, heading upstairs to the bathroom. He made sure the water was hot, to take away her chill.

 He then undressed her, kissing her forehead gently. Once they were both undressed, he carried her to the bath and lay them both into the water. She lay against his chest and he wrapped his arms around her, kissing her shoulder tenderly. "Will ... I sometimes wonder. Does ... being a death god ... mean we bring death to ... everyone we touch?"

 He felt his heart ache for her, she sounded completely broken. "Of course not. Sometimes loved ones pass away too soon. It's not your fault at all."

 "I want to plant Ericas ... on her grave. Alan showed me ... them once. The flowers would ... reflect her beauty ... ever so well."

 "Of course, it would be a lovely token." She continued to sob quietly, as William washed her and cuddled her, glad that she was beggining to warm up. He carried her from the bath and dried her off, before taking her to the bedroom and placing her on the bed.

 He got them both dressed and they snuggled under the covers. Grell's body was trembling, as tears continued to fall. William held her tightly, smoothing her hair with his one hand.

 After a few hours, Grell fell into an exhausted sleep. William watched her for a while, hoping tomorow he could heal her pain, before he too fell asleep.

 ----

 Morning came and Grell didn't cry as soon as she woke up, though she still looked terribly sad. William peppered her with kisses and small moans left her. He spent a while on small kisses to her neck and slight touches, before she pulled at his clothes. He undressed her and made sweet, tender love to her, until she began to smile again.

 They later headed out to Ronald's, before he had to go to work, so William could explain why Grell hadn't been present the previous day. He also knew that Ronald had brought a present for their anniversary.

They went back home a short time afterwards, Grell still seeming down. She turned to William and spoke quietly, eyes glistening with unshed tears. "William, I know that yesterday was awful and I'm still devastated by our loss, but can we try to enjoy this day the best we can. It is rather special, after all."

 He pulled her into a hug. "Absolutely. I do not wish to see you upset. Things will get easier with time, I promise you."

 They had spent the rest of the day cuddling and being intimate, until it was time to get ready for their date at the restaurant. William had ordered Grell the finest meal, with a giant chocolate gateau for dessert. They chatted over general things, being more interested in just enjoying each other's company.

 Walking back home, William was beggining to feel nervous. It was time to ask Grell the most important question in the world.

When they got home, William turned to Grell.  "Grell I have a present for you, I hope you will like it." He went to retrieve a large box and slipped the small ring box into his coat pocket.

 Walking back, he placed the large present on the kitchen table. Grell unwrapped it and opened the box, gasping in amazement. "William! It's so beautiful, I love it! She said, pulling out an expensive looking crimson dress.

 William stood in front of her and spoke. "I hope you know just how much I love you. You are everything to me, my entire world. Nothing could compare to the way I feel for you." He pulled the box from his pocket and knelt down on one knee. "As such, I have something to ask you. Grell Sutcliff, would you do me the honour of becoming my wife?"

 Grell stood their in shock for a second, gaping as the ring was presented to her. Her heart leapt, as she realised her dreams had turned to reality. " of course I will! I love you so much! I want nothing more than to marry you, darling."

 Happy tears slipped from her eyes, as William slid the ring onto her finger and pulled her into a long, tender kiss. After all that they had been through, their story would finally have an happy ending.


	33. Save me from this life. Prequel chap one. Grating worry.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First chap of the prequel to dod

 He had no idea how this had all begun. When his annoyance at this woman had turned to an intense fondness. When that fondness had turned to something he could only think to be love. One thing he did know know though, was that he loved her to pieces and though he had never showed it, he would do anything for her. He had yet to tell her however, being too stoic and shut off from his emotions to ever utter those three words.

 Finally he had broken through his own inner barrier and had left a bouquet of red roses on her office desk, along with a note asking her out on a date that weekend. There was just one problem. A big problem. She hadn't turned up for work yesterday or today.

 He was growing worried, as she never skipped a day of work. As the end of his shift came into view, his concern only grew. That was when he decided to take a visit to her flat, to check on her, to make sure she was okay.

\-----

 At six pm, William headed to her flat, worry grating away at him. He knocked on the door but there was no answer. He tried again and having received no reply once again, he tried the handle. To his surprise and dismay, the door was unlocked.

 Scared of what he may find, he opened the door and took a tentative step inside. She wasn't in the living room or kitchen, so he walked to the bedroom. He knocked on the bedroom door and heard a voice from inside of the room. "Go away! I don't want to hear your excuses this time. I don't want to see you!"

 William's brow knitted in confusion at that statement, before he pushed down the handle and entered the bedroom. An angry looking redhead was standing up from the bed. Her glare turned to a look of surprise, when she realised who she had just shouted at. "William? What are you doing here?"


	34. Prequel chap 2. Confrontation.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> totally robbed the name from tirnels email. #sorrysonotsorry

 William immediately noticed how awful the redhead looked. She had large bruises on her face and cuts up her unclothed arms. Receiving no answer, Grell spoke again. “I asked you what you’re doing here.”

 “I just came to check on you, you haven’t been present at work in the past two days.”

 She sat back down on the bed, rubbing an injury on her back. “Of course, all you do care about is your career. Wouldn’t want me tarnishing your perfect record, right?”

 William felt a pang of guilt hit him; he always had been too hard on her at work. “I was actually concerned over your wellbeing. Judging by your appearance, it seems I was right to be worried.”

 She glared at him, before speaking again, voice thick with sarcasm. “Oh, you’re saying you actually care about me? Don’t make me laugh. Words are cheap. Like you’ve ever shown me anything but annoyance.”

 “I do … actually care about you, a great deal.”

 Her eyes widened slightly, before she became angry again. “No you don’t! Nobody cares about me, if they did, I wouldn’t be …” Her voice trailed off.

 William raised an eyebrow at her, awaiting the end of her sentence. When she didn’t carry on speaking, he asked “Wouldn’t be what? Sutcliff, what has happened to you?”

 “It’s not important!” She snapped.

 “Yes it is, as your supervisor, I demand to know.” He moved and sat down next to her on the bed.

 “I said it doesn’t matter what he…” Her fists clenched. “Just get out!”

 William lifted his hand, placing it on her shoulder. She looked at him in surprise. “Who is ‘he’? Someone hurt you, didn’t they? Please just tell me, Sutcliff or I won’t be able to help.”

 “I don’t need anyone’s help, I’m fine. I won’t let Jack hurt me anymore. Now get out!”

 William shook his head. “No, I will not. Now tell me, who is Jack?”

 “No! Get the hell out!” When she realised he wasn’t going to leave, she whispered. “He’s … my partner." A pang of jealousy hit William; on realising she had someone else.

 “You shouldn’t let someone do that to you, Grell … you’re too special for such a thing.”

 Grell just sat there in shock, before she finally spoke again. “Why are you acting like you care? And yes I know, it’s over between us. I’ve had enough of dealing with his anger. Next time I see him, I’ll chop him to pieces.”

 “Because I do care. Much more than you realise and you won’t have to deal with him, I’m staying here tonight. I care about you so much. I’ll keep you safe.”

 She shot him an annoyed look. “I can deal with him on my own. I don’t need you to-.” The rest of her words were lost, as William moved forward and pressed his lips hard against hers. She tensed up, having not expected this. Not expected the man she had always loved to be kissing her, to be showing any sort of affection. She kissed back with just as much force, pushing her tongue inside his mouth. He laced his tongue with hers, pushing her down onto the bed.

 As they broke away from the kiss, William smiled slightly, before speaking. “I told you that I cared for you, did I not?”

 “Oh, William. Okay, you … you can stay for tonight.”


	35. Prequel chap 3. I think i love you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can anyone guess this little thing about Jack which Grell is keeping secret?

 That night so far had been amazing for the both of them, especially for William. Once Grell’s back injury had begun to heal, she had crawled on top of him and kissed him passionately. Soon, both of their clothes were discharged and William had looked up at this beautiful woman, as she rode on top of him, head tilted back and finger nails scraping against his chest. He knew at that moment just how addicted to her he would become. Her sweet moans and soft skin were intoxicating for him, as he had thrust up deeply into her. She was thinner than he was expecting and he didn’t know if that was how she had always been or if the stress of her abuse had made her weight drop.

 She loved every minute of the passion between them, feeling no guilt as she thought of herself and Jack as separated after what he had put her through that day. She would never forgive him and would never go back to him.

 The rough intimacy dragged on into the early hours of the morning and she was surprised at just how high his sex drive actually was. He ravaged her time and time again, in all sorts of different positions. He enjoyed it most as he thrust into her from above, her back pressed into the bed, looking into his eyes with her own beautiful ones.

 He pulled out and rolled off of her and she cuddled into his side. He scooped her up in his arms and they snuggled under the covers. “Sutcliff … I think I’m in love with you.”

 She giggled softly. “Am I really that good in bed?”

 He shook his head. “No, even before that … I have felt this for you.”

 “Well I’ve known that I have always loved you deeply, darling. Hopefully, soon you’ll know too, instead of just thinking it.”

 “Yes, I think that will indeed be the case.” They fell asleep then, cuddled against each other. A few hours later, William had to get up for work. As he moved away from her, she opened her eyes and he looked down at her. “I have to go to work soon, Sutcliff. If Jack comes to your door, don’t answer it. I’ll come and see you in your office later.”

 She nodded. “Hmm, office sex sounds fabulous.” He smiled at her, before he left to go home and get ready for work.

 She sighed as he ported off, knowing full well that if she didn’t answer the door, Jack would just break it down, being the way he was. Still, she was determined to tell him it was over between them and to get him to leave her alone for good. She fell back to sleep for a while, waking up later to get herself ready for work. She had missed being there the past two days, as she thoroughly enjoyed collecting souls and swinging her cherished chainsaw above her head.

 Just as she was about to finish up and put her shoes on, there was a loud bang at the door. She opened it to see Jack scowling at her, red eyes glowing dangerously. She gulped, had he seen William leave earlier?

\-----

 William looked over at his clock, frowning when he saw it was one ‘pm’. Grell should have been at work an hour ago and at seeing the flowers on her desk, she was surely to have found William to comment on them. Maybe she hadn’t been to her office and had just gone straight out on collections? No, he thought, that couldn’t possibly be the case. She would have had to have collected her ledger from her office to be able to do that.

 He sighed and stood up, turning to head to Grell’s office. He walked in and frowned. There was no sign of her, the flowers still in the exact same spot he had left them in. They had begun to wilt and he picked them up, throwing them in a hallway bin as he left the room. He would be able to get her some more later.

He walked back to him desk, picking up his scythe and ported to the floor where Grell’s flat was housed. The door was once again unlocked and this time slightly ajar. As he walked near to the bedroom, he could hear small groans coming from inside. He pushed the door open and gasped at the sight.


	36. Prequel chap 4. Stop acting so brave.

 Grell had been blindfolded and was tied to the railing of her bed, lying on her back. All her clothes had been ripped off, leaving just a shred of her collar around her neck. She was grunting and groaning, pulling sharply against the material around her wrists. Blood stained the sheets between her legs and large cuts lined up her chest and shoulders.

 William rushed over to her, being shocked at the stench of demon which filled the room. “Get the hell away from me!” She hissed, at feeling the bed dip as William knelt down next to her.

 “Sutcliff, calm down. It’s just me.” William soothed, as he removed the cloth that was covering her eyes and tied behind her head. “Why … didn’t you tell me Jack was a demon?” He felt a pang of guilt hit him; he should have taken her with him that morning.

 She looked away from him, still pulling at the bindings. William spoke again. “What on earth did ‘it’ do to you?”

 She scowled at him. “Isn’t it perfectly obvious? Don’t just sit there, untie me.”

 “Oh yes, of course. Sorry.” He unknotted the ties and she sat up sharply, wincing as pain shot up through her.

 “I need to get myself cleaned up.” She stood up from the bed but her legs buckled. She fell to the ground and William moved quickly to her side of the bed, helping her to sit back up.

 “I’ll help.”

 Her head shot up to glare at him. “I don’t need your help! I’m perfectly fine.”

 William sighed. “No you are not. You’re bleeding quite badly still. It’s not safe here; I am taking you to my house.”

 “I said I don’t need your help! Just go away.” He didn’t move and she looked at the ground. “Fine but get me some clothes first, at least.” William moved to her wardrobe, picking out some clean clothes, as well as some underwear and socks. He grabbed a pair of shoes and handed it all over to her. He then scooped her up in his arms and ported them to the bedroom of his home.

He sat her on the bed and then walked to the en suite to grab a towel. He ran it under the tap for a second and then walked back to the bedroom. She had moved the clothes to her side and was lying on the bed, the sitting position making her body ache. William sat down next to her and wiped the blood from her chest, grimacing at a deep puncture near her heart. “He missed.” She said coldly.

 “What happened this morning, Sutcliff?”

She huffed and then spoke. “I told him it was over … between us. He flipped and threw me against a wall. I got knocked out. When I woke up, I … was all tied up. After he ... did ‘that’ to me, he stabbed me with his claw. He tried to kill me. I don’t know … if he saw you leave my place, he was already angry about something.”

 More guilt washed over him. “Well he isn’t going to ever hurt you again. I will not allow it. Roll over, so I can clean your bottom half.”

 “I can do that myself.” She said angrily.

William sighed. She was acting enraged but he could see the tears that were pricking at her eyes and knew she was deeply upset and hurt. Maybe even scared. “Please just let me help Sutcliff, moving too much will just cause you more pain.”

 “Fine, whatever.” She pouted, rolling over slowly. He cleaned her and went down stairs to get some bandages. Once he had wrapped them around the few cuts that were still bleeding slightly and the deep wound, he helped her get dressed.

 She sat up in bed, against a pillow pressed to the headboard. “I’m going to make him pay for this!” She hissed.

 William could hear her voice cracking, as she tried to stop the tears from falling. He knelt at her side and cupped her cheeks with both his palms, making her look at him. “You … can cry … if you want. I can see how upset you are. I’m not going to judge you … for showing emotions.”

 She pulled her head from his grip and shook it. “I don’t want … to cry … over him. He’s not worth it!” It was too late, as tears slipped down her cheeks and her body began to shake with choked sobs.

 William pulled her gently into his arms, soothing her hair. She pressed her face into his chest; loud cry’s slipping from her mouth. He kissed the top of her head. “You’re staying here from now on. I want you at my side. I … I love you. You’ll be safe here, I promise.”


	37. Prequel chap 5. I'm here for you.

 William stayed by her side for the rest of the day, more concerned with her wellbeing than his paperwork. He’d be able to catch up with it tomorrow. She fell to sleep in his arms a few hours later, only to wake up screaming from having a nightmare. She jumped away from William and when he tried to comfort her, she pushed his hands away and rolled over. “I’m going to kill that monster,” she muttered to herself.

 William placed his hand on her shoulder but she shook it off. “Leave me alone. I don’t need your help! Take me home.”

 “No Grell, it’s not safe for you there. I told you, you can stay here.”

 “I’m going home!” She said, voice cracking again. She stood up, wincing slightly, her injuries only just beginning to heal. William rolled over to her side of the bed and stood up too, grabbing her wrist. “William, let me go.”

 “Why? So that demon can hurt your again? I’m not letting that filth lay another finger on you.”

 She shook her head. “He wasn’t always like this. He was just passionate, never angry. What did I ever do to deserve this?”

 “Nothing, you don’t deserve this. You’re just in shock, that’s all. Just try to calm down.”

 She pulled her arm from his grip. “Just leave me alone.” She went to put her shoes on.

 “I love you. I thought you loved me too. Why do you want to run off to that demon again?”

 She glared up at him. “Shut up!” She stood back up, turning to leave out the door.

 “Stop acting like this. I’m just trying to help, Sutcliff.”

 She turned back around to face him. “I don’t … need your help. I’m fine on my own.”

 He walked up and stood right in front of her. “You’re not fine. You are obviously on the verge of tears again.” He could see her eyes shining once more. “Stop trying to act like this hasn’t upset you.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to his chest.

 “I said leave me alone. I can handle this … mess by … myself.” Her shoulders started to shake, as the tears leaked from her eyes. “Why … did he do this to me … I thought he loved me.”

 William kissed the top of her head. “It doesn’t love you. If it did, it wouldn’t have hurt you like this.” He let her go and stood back, cupping his fingers under her chin and looking into her eyes. “But I love you. I’ll never hurt you like that. You're too special for such cruelness. You need not deal with this on your own.”

 She smiled slightly, before leaning forward to kiss him. As she pulled away, she spoke, “I love you too. Ever so much.” He pulled her back over to the bed and she sat down. He took her shoes off and sat next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. She lay her head on his shoulder, tears drying on her face as she began to relax. “Thank you, Will.” They stayed like that for a while, until she asked him to go over to her flat to get her hair brush and make up.

\----

 A while later, William returned to the bedroom of his house. She looked up at him from the bed and gasped. His face was covered in blood and his clothes torn. One hand held a bag full of makeup, his scythe tucked under his arm. His other hand was pressed to his side, blood staining his shirt around it.

 She stood up and rushed over to him. “Will, what happened to you?”

 The makeup bag and scythe clattered to the floor, as William fell forward. She caught him and helped him steady himself. “That filthy creature was at your flat when I arrived. He attacked me. You were … correct, he had seen us together. It’s all over now, it’s dead. You have nothing to be afraid of anymore.

She looked at him in shock, unsure of whether to feel horrified or happy. She wanted him dead for what he had done to her but she felt attached to him somewhat, they had shared some happy memories. She helped William over to the bed and they both sat down. He held her hand and looked at her. “You’re safe now. You’ll be safe from now on, no one can hurt you ever again. I won’t let them.”


	38. Prequel chap 6. Loss of friend, loss of a love?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> last but one chapter.

 Grell had decided not to mope over Jack’s death, he deserved it after all. She was also glad to not have to deal with getting beaten up on a daily basis. Her relationship so far with Will had gone so well and he had been ever so kind to her at the very start, comforting her when she had nightmares. Those nightmares soon faded into the distance, replaced by happy memories and passionate moments.

 She couldn’t get enough of this man, forever at his side when they were home and always coming into his office at work. He seemed just as addicted to her, forever holding her in his arms and being as gentle with her as possible. At least, that was when Grell didn’t demand nights filled with nothing but fierce sex and days of him pounding into her over his desk.

 A few months ago, they had gone to Edinburgh, Scotland, for their three year anniversary. It was so lovely and Grell had never wanted their trip to end. They had spent the days touring around the city and had hardly gotten any sleep, William making love to her into the early hours of the morning. She loved the man to pieces and could never see anything happening that would ever change that.

 One day, she walked into Ronald’s office, to see him crying into his hands at his desk. Once he had pulled himself together somewhat, he had given her the news of Alan and Eric’s deaths. She was shocked to hear how it had happened. She knew Alan was going to die but never expected it to be at the hands of Eric and she never expected Sebastian to be the one to kill Eric.

 Her heart went out to Ronald; she knew how close he had been to the pair. As such, she had spent most nights during the next few months at his flat, trying her best to comfort him and cheer him up. As the days dragged on, she noticed William growing more distant. Once she had finally felt assured that Ronald was feeling better, she soon realised the reason for Williams’s change of behaviour. He was drinking and drinking a lot.

 She began to worry for him and one night decided to confront him on the issue. He barely talked to her when he was drunk and she soon realised it would have been best to just have left him alone. Walking into the kitchen, she looked over at him, bottle of whiskey in his hand. “William, why do you keep drinking so much?” Receiving no answer, she spoke again. “You need to stop this; I don’t like you when you drink. You barely pay me any attention anymore.”

 He looked over at him, frowning. “I shall do what I want to, Sutcliff. Be quiet”

 “No. It’s doing you no good. I won’t let you carry on with this stupidity.” She said, concern for her love growing. She didn’t understand what was wrong. Why he had turned to liquor. She gasped when the bottle came hurtling towards her and smashed against the wall at her side. “What the hell was that for?” She asked angrily.

 He stood up quickly, swaying slightly. “I told you to shut up!”

 “No Will, I’m worried about you. This isn’t like you at all.”

 He staggered over to her, scowling in rage. “Just shut your filthy mouth.”

 “I will not. Not unti- agh.” She winched, as she felt William slam his fist into her stomach. He grabbed her hair and shoved her to the floor. “Will! What are you doing?” A foot collided with her side and she whimpered, pushing herself onto her hands and knees. William lifted his leg and kicked her in the rib, making her fall over onto her back.

 He stomped on her stomach again and again, before turning to go upstairs. “I told you to shut your mouth. Don’t make me warn you again.” He left the room and she sat up slowly, her stomach muscles aching. She felt angry but more than that, she was determined. To help him. To get her sweet partner back.


	39. Prequel chap 6. You lied, William. I'm not safe around you, not safe at all.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finished!!!! omg I want to cry. This was been a long, emotional writing journey. This chapter covers the time between his drinking problem starting and the beginning of chapter one.

 After the first time William had lashed out at her, Grell had continued to try to talk to him about his drinking and to try and get him to stop. After a few weeks of being constantly hit and kicked as soon as she opened her mouth, she stopped trying to talk to him. Instead she would attempt to stay away from him inside of their home.

 It was too late however, as once he had started to become violent, he would get mad at her over every little thing. The abuse was only getting worse, the attacks lasting longer with each night that passed. At first she would fight back but soon realised it was of no use, he was heavier and stronger than her when she had no weapon to protect herself. No matter how many times she kicked at him or scratched his face, he wouldn’t stop and would just hit her harder. Instead, she began to try and just get away from him, trying and failing each time to push him off and run out of the room.

 Grell felt her strong will start to break, as she withdrew into herself. She no longer felt like the confident woman she used to be, who wouldn’t let anything stand in her way and would brush her problems off as if they didn’t phrase her. She wanted to tell someone about her problem, to confide in Ronald but she couldn’t. She couldn’t face anyone thinking of her as weak. She wanted people to keep their impression of her, the fiery redhead who wouldn’t take any hassle or unkindness from anyone without fierce retaliation.

 She wanted to leave William and never look back but she clung to the hope that one day he would go back to being the sweet man she had always known. That one day, he would stop this senseless violence. She also loved him too much to ever abandon him; especially when he needed her the most and it was clear he needed her right now. Every night, after he sobered, he would come and cuddle into her, crying and apologising again and again. She knew the ‘sorrys’ that slipped from his mouth were sincere, that he regretted everything he had done to her. She could see him suffering and wanted so very much to just help him out of this hole of drunken despair.

 It wasn’t until one night that she felt her heart break and began to wonder if he was beyond saving. If he had turned out to be just like Jack. William had started to become jealous when he drank, holding his insecurities inside until the whiskey had taken affect and then taking them out on her.

 He had her pinned against the wall, shouting at her for spending too much time with Ronald. That’s when she felt her anger at the situation bubble over. “You’re just a monster! Get away from me!” She came to regret those words for months to come.

 He gripped her around the throat. “Don’t you dare call me that! Don’t you dare ... compare me to that thing you used to fuck! I’ll show you that … you’re mine. No one else’s!" She choked on a sob, letting herself cry for the first time since William had begun drinking when she felt his erection pressing against her leg. Memories of Jack’s assault flashed through her mind and she cried harder.

 He shoved her to the floor, sitting on top of her back and grabbing her hair. He smashed her face into the floor and then repeated the process. As the amount of times her face collided with the floor entered double figures, she became dizzy and stopped struggling. He got off of her and rolled her onto her back. He stood up and stomped on her stomach and face, until blood ran from her nose. He slammed his foot down on her arm and she felt a bone break, making her scream out in agony.

 She tried to clamber to her feet but her body wouldn’t move, pain shooting through every part of it. Her eyes widened in horror, as William sat down between her legs and ripped her underwear from her. He pulled his pants down from under his nightgown, freeing himself and then dragged her hips up onto his knees. She tried to roll over but his hold on her hips was too tight, soft skin bruising under the force of his fingers. He pulled her closer and lined himself up with her entrance. “Will, … please no, anything … but this, please … I’m begging you.” She pleaded weakly, voice cracking.

 “Shut up! Filthy whore. You’re mine! Never forget that.” He rammed inside her, tearing the delicate skin and she choked on a scream, whole body tensing up. He pounded into her without mercy, moving forward to grab her throat, as he pulled back before slamming into her again. She just lay there in shock, unable to move. As soon as he had violated her body, she knew her life had fallen into disrepair. That nothing would be the same again. Small, pathetic sobs left her, feeling blood leak out of her. She willed the assault to end, her insides burning as the skin tore further. He carried on for what felt like forever, each thrust sending crushing pain shooting through her.

 Eventually, she felt thick liquid seep inside her and he pulled out. She lay on the floor, broken inside in every way possible for hours, until William finally came and found her lying in the exact place he had left her.

 Once the sexual assaults had started, they continued every night. Sometimes she would be lucky enough to find William already passed out from the alcohol when she returned home from work but those nights were few and far between.

One night, she attended Ronald’s birthday party. She knew it was a bad idea, that William would be enraged when she returned home but she didn’t have a choice. If she refused, Ronald would know something was wrong and she couldn’t find it in herself to tell him what it was. It would all seem too real then, instead of just some awful nightmare. She crept into the house quietly that night, hoping William would already be asleep. She wasn’t blessed enough for that to be the case.

\-----

 A loud bang echoed through the living room of a large house, the home of one high status reaper and his partner. "Get off me!" A female voice shrieked. There was another loud bang, as a liquor bottle smashed over her head. She slid down the wall she had been pressed against.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you see what I did there? Using the first paragraph of chapter one to loop the story around on itself. Trying to make my readers go back to chapter one to see the happy ending again heheheh. I'm so evil.


	40. Sequel part two.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just had to .... set after the first sequel. Two years or so later.

Grell sat in the small room; pen in a shaking hand, as she wrote an all-important letter:

 Why, William? Why did you do this? We were so happy. We had been married for a year and you just destroyed everything we had built together, without thinking of the consequences. Seemingly without regret.

 What you have done can never be forgiven. I still don’t understand why you did such a thing. I thought you loved me but no, you chained me like an animal and tortured me for days. You raped me, again. You would have probably tortured me … until you finally decided to take my life. If Ronald hadn’t of realised something was wrong, I would be just a body in the ground by now. Part of me wishes I was … that I would have just been killed, so I wouldn’t have to deal with the nightmares and memories of your abuse.

 You are so lucky that Ronald didn’t kill you on the spot; I know that he wanted to. But no, he had to get me to the hospital. I’ve been here for months, trying to recover mentally from what you did. From the lies you told. From the promises you broke. From the heart of mine that you left shattered and discarded in tiny pieces. I know you tried to come to see me, once you had sobered but I wouldn’t let you. I’ll never let you back into my life again.

 I don’t understand why you even did ‘that’ again. No matter how many times I asked, no matter how many times that question was screamed at you while you brutalised me, you never answered. Maybe you didn’t have an answer? Maybe you just felt like doing it? Whatever the reason, I do not care anymore. I wish not to hear your excuses.

 I love you. I will always love you but you have made it quite clear that you do not love me. How could you say you love someone but do such awful things to them? The answer is simple. It isn’t love. Maybe lust or obsession but definitely not love. I am leaving you William, for good. I am leaving the branch, so that I will never again have to see that evil face of yours. That face that I love so much. That face that showed no emotion, as you tore a hole in my body; in my heart. This is goodbye, William. Do not try to contact me. If I see you again, I will cut you to shreds with my death scythe. I will hurt you so badly, just like you have hurt me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just in the mood for sad endings today. Esp after crying over my Elan fic for ages.


End file.
